Feeling so lost

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1

Hi,

I’m feeling so lost right now. After 2+ weeks of hospital appointments, hcg blood tests, scans, etc I was diagnosed diagnosed an ectopic pregnancy 2 days ago. On that day I was seen by 3 different doctors who wanted me to have 3 different treatments. I felt completely lost and confused.

The third doctor (and the one I felt most comfortable witb) ended up leading my care. Yesterday I had the methotrexate injection which made me feel awful. I stayed in hospital for the afternoon but have been suffering stomach cramps since. I’m also absolutely exhausted.

I can’t even begin to explain how I feel mentally. The stress of the hospital appointments before my diagnosis was too much at times but now I don’t even know what to do next. I don’t know how to process what has happened.

This was a planned pregnancy. We struggled with infertility when we were trying for our daughter who is now 2 and a half. I had PTSD from her birth which took a long time to get past and to prepare mentally for another pregnancy. The thought of going through the uncertainty of first trimester again and the potential for another loss in a future pregnancy genuinely scares me. But we want another baby to complete our family.

I’ve been signed off work for 2 weeks which has helped but I’m dreading going back already. I’m a teacher which is stressful enough as it is and there are a lot of pregnant staff at the moment.

I have a good support network but I still feel so empty, drained and I don’t know how to process what’s going on.

Thank you for reading how I feel. I’m so glad I found this network and that there are other people in similar situations.

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Hi October_penguin,

My heart goes out to you. I’m so sorry that you’ve experienced this ectopic pregnancy and loss. We know how challenging of a time it can be, especially as your diagnosis was so recent. Please know that we are here for you. Right now, especially with the MTX injection, it is so important to take things slowly, prioritize your rest, and look after yourself. (I realize that can be difficult with a 2-year-old in the house).

Suffering an ectopic pregnancy can cause many emotions, bring up many questions, and can be a very confusing time. You are not alone in what you are experiencing. These boards are safe spaces, filled with posts of women and men who are bound by this unfortunate experience.

We are here for any questions you have. Right now, I just want you to know that everything you have expressed is so very normal. It’s completely reasonable to seek additional time off of work, and I encourage you to speak with your GP about any appropriate notes. As well, your employer might be open to considering part-time, doing certain tasks from home, or a phased return.

As you are just starting the mtx, it’s important to rest and to continue to monitor your hcg levels. Unfortunately, until these levels are at nonpregnant status, there remains the chance of rupture. We encourage you to monitor for any change in intensity or severity of symptoms, including heavy bleeding or shoulder tip pain. In these cases, you will want to be seen at your A&E or by calling 111.

We are here for you for as long as you need.

With good wishes,

Michele

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards

During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.

If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?

Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk

Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk

We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653

Take a look at our newsletters and subscribe to our mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/986bdd6091ee/ectopic-matters

Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team