Hi all
I’d really love some advice please. I had my first miscarriage in December 2016 at five weeks. Fast forward to October 2017 and I found out I was pregnant again. But devastatingly it was ectopic and I had emergency surgery after my left tube ruptured. Only eight weeks after that in December 2017 I found out I was pregnant again. My due date would have been exactly the same date as my first pregnancy, only a year later. I really thought this baby was meant to be, but sadly it was ectopic yet again.
They managed to save my right tube, although they found endometriosis during surgery. My gynaecologist is recommending we try again for natural conception, but I’m terrified. Utterly terrified. I can’t go through that again, but I’m desperate for a baby.
I don’t know whether to try again and just hope it’s in the right place. IVF is invasive, it doesn’t always work and it’s an emotional rollercoaster. But my chances of having another ectopic is so much lower with IVF (my gynaecologist said my chance of an ectopic through IVF is 5%, but it’d be between 30%-40% with natural conception).
I just don’t know what to do… does anyone have any advice or stories? I don’t have any children and I’m 29.
Xxx
Dear Fertility-tales,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancies and losses,
Sadly I am not medically trained and without knowledge of your medical history, we are unable to give advice upon your options and I would be guided by your medical team.
It is natural to be worried after everything you have been through. Sadly even with IVF there is the risk of ectopic pregnancy and as you have suffered the condition twice there is sadly an increased risk. However it is important to remember that help is available and your doctors should book you in for an early scan at around six weeks to check that the embryo is in the right place. I am not sure where you are located but if you are in the UK you can also contact your local Early Pregnancy Unit direct and self refer for an early scan. This can also give you peace of mind that you have the care available should you need some reassurance.
Making the decision to begin trying to conceive is an emotional rollercoaster compounded by our sad loss. Again, you are not alone. We here emotional support whenever you need us.
Sending much love,
Karen x
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Further information is available at www.ectopic.org.uk
Email us at ept@ectopic.org.uk.
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I wondered the same myself. I had my first ectopic in December 2014 (left tube ruptured) and second ectopic in January 2018 (right tube treated with MTH). I have sat thinking about this so much over this last two months; my consulatant has recommended a HSG and if my remaining tube is not blocked I will give it one last go. I’m terrified but I have recently started reading ‘The Secret’ novel to get into positive way of thinking and I have started alternative therapies for example: acupuncture, taking vitamin supplements, green tea etc and I’m gona put faith in my body and mind that I can give this one last go if the tube is clear. Best of luck with your decision; listen to your gut instinct and you will find an answer x
Hi
That’s fantastic advice, thank you. I’m so sorry to hear about your losses, I really hope your next one is your rainbow baby. But it sounds like you’ve made your decision on what to do next, and you should be really proud of yourself for being so strong.
My gynaecologist gave us the same advice, to have a HSG and then try again if my remaining tube isn’t blocked. But my gut instinct is not to try again naturally but have IVF. If I could have a guarantee that I’d try again, get pregnant straight away and then we’d know if it was ectopic, then I’d do that. But it’s the waiting. Each month desperately hoping I’m pregnant but being terrified if I am. I’d be nervous to do anything, book a holiday in advance or commit to travel for work in case I had an ectopic and I was far from a hospital.
I appreciate that I’m coming across as very negative here! I’m not in a great head space at the moment.
FT
FT,
I live in Ireland and I had to really fight in hospital this time to save my tube. It took so much time for doctors to agree to give me the MTH. I knew something was wrong at 4 weeks 3 days. In Ireland there is laws against terminating pregnancies, even though I had a history of ectopic, my bloods were abnormal and they couldn’t find a sac, they made me wait for 5 hcg readings (48 hours between each test), so that’s probably why I feel so strong about giving myself one last shot if it’s clear. I was given advice from Consultant in the UK at the time and they would’ve given me the injection by the third hcg reading. I am terrified but we just don’t have the funds right now for IVF aswell. Everyone’s journey is different though, as long as you feel it is the right decision in your heart then go for it my dear. I wish you all the best, keep in touch
MGE x