To summarise my story… I’ve been pregnant 7 times previously, with two babies to show for it. First early miscarriage, then my first son, then another early miscarriage, then an ectopic which blew my left tube wide open, then a missed miscarriage which ended with hemorrhage and blood transfusion and then my second son and then another early miscarriage. And here I sit, age 38, 4 weeks and 4 days pregnant.
As an aside, I hope that my journey gives hope to those of you out there wondering whether you’ll conceive again after an ectopic - it happened for me with my second son, perhaps it’s happening again - time will tell!
But basically - I’m driving myself completely insane and wondered if anybody might have any other advice on how to try and stay at least a little positive…
I have taken a test every morning just so I can tell myself each day “today I am pregnant” and that is helping. But I worry about every single cramp and twinge and drop of discharge (sorry if tmi). At work yesterday I went to the toilet 8 times during my lunch hour just to check!
I registered with my local maternity services and a midwife called me today to book the first appointment and honestly I felt like a fraud. I just genuinely don’t see this pregnancy progressing that far.
On the other hand, I also called the early pregnancy unit to book a scan in a couple of weeks time and that has given me a little relief just knowing I will hopefully know.
Any advice on how to get through the next two weeks in the meantime would be gratefully received.
Thats very sad that you have so much bad traumatic experience. My heart goes with you. Luckily you also have two wonderful sons. For this time you have all possible scenarios - normal pregnancy, miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy. And you now that there is nothing you can do to change how this pregnancy will be. Of course we all are hoping that this will be a wonderful normal pregnancy with a baby to love. It seems that you have post traumatic stress syndrome symptoms. Maybe you could contact a psychologist until you receive an answer about how this pregnancy is going.
A week ago I had my last tube removed because of ectopic pregnancy again. Today I will have my first appointment with a psychologist whose field is infertility and losses.
Give us an update how are you going and we are hoping that everything will be okay!
Whispered congratulations on your pregnancy, I fully understand you feeling petrified after all you have been through. I am similar to you in the number of pregnancies vs. births. When I ended up pregnant many years later after my ectopics, I was in disbelief, and in extra disbelief when it worked out.
After an ectopic pregnancy, finding we are pregnant again can be a mix of emotions,it is perfectly normal to feel scared. I remember, I felt twinges and aches when I next felt pregnant after my ectopic pregnancy. My mind started racing and I was only really able to relax to some degree after my early scan. It is a nerve-wracking time and you have a friend here who understands how you are feeling.
Sending you much love and positive thoughts,
Michele
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So sorry to hear about what sounds like a lot of very challenging times (though great to hear about gour 2 sons). My own bagage is 2 EPs and a missed miscarriage, and I relate to many things in your description - the frequent bathroom checks, stress, and all.
In all of my own experiences of that early, anxious wait, I’ve really found distraction to be the best strategy, along with therapy. Any activities that require your full attention and doesn’t allow your mind to wander.. since there is really nothing to do but wait. I realize that might be challenging with two kids though!
I am sending you my best thoughts. That wait really can be excrutiating. Hopefully time will slowly but surely alleviate your concerns. Wishing you all the best for this pregnancy.