Hi everyone,
I had my ectopic last September (after doing IVF for the first time, two years into TTC) that resulted in having my right fallopian tube removed. I had a strange occurrence of events where my Hcg levels started to increase again after the surgery, so about 3 weeks after my surgery, I had a D&C (that didn’t stop the rising Hcg), so then an additional shot of methotrexate which finally stopped it. It was a very painful experience for me (physically, emotionally)…but I got through it. In Feb we tried a round of Clomid/IUI (no luck) and in April we tried IVF a second time (only one day 6 Embryo) but no luck again.
They are increasing my meds this time and I am hoping for better results. I turned 37 last week and usually like my bday, but not this year.
A friend of mine was two weeks ahead of me with her pregnancy when I was pregnant last year, and it’s been really hard for me to watch her pregnancy and the milestones of her son on social media.
I’ve been really moody the last few weeks, and in particular today. Tuesday I have to do this SHG test to make sure my uterus is OK and what not. Very nervous I’ll hear bad news.
Just feeling a lot of fear about starting IVF again, and not sure how to stay hopeful when mostly I’m fearing another disappointment.
I am a spiritual person of faith, and am trying to pray and keep up my self-care, but am really struggling.
I also really struggle with the two week wait and how to not sleuth the internet for clues on what ‘may’ or ‘may not’ be happening. Any advice on how to get through that, or any advice at all, is gratefully appreciated.
Thanks,
Jennifer
A www jennifer, you’re going through so much. I know the pain and worry won’t go away until you are pregnant and have your baby in your arms. It’s an awful feeling that you can’t control. I’ve had 2 ectopics not I’ve but I know hoe you feel I’m 5 days post operation and I’m miserable and snappy. Try and keep strong and not get stressed if you can because that may affect you getting pregnant maybe go for a long walk to de stress. I know I can’t get pregnant when stressed but when I didn’t worry about it I got pregnant twice! Weird isn’t it. Sending you love, hope, and that things will happen for you. We are trying again next year maybe IVF but still have one more tube to try. Can I ask do they fertilise the egg and out it in the uterus or do they put it in the tube? Xxx 
Thanks for your thoughts C_Louise! Had my SHG test today and luckily, my uterus is looking OK (no fibroids or scar tissue) so we are good to go with IVF.
IVF is where they give you ovulation stimulation drugs, they take out the viable follicles/eggs, and yes, fertilize with sperm outside the body. My clinic in NYC will only transfer embryos that last until day 5 or 6.
I have one tube left on the left, but I guess have ‘unexplained’ infertility since we’ve been trying for three years and it hasn’t happened naturally.
IVF did work for me though (the first time, but was ectopic). The second time I wasn’t so lucky, but am hoping for #3 here!
One thing I’ve decided to do is stay off of social media for the next 6-8 weeks. It triggers me seeing people’s kids, and also, when I get to the 2WW, I’m really going to make a promise to myself to not sleuth around, looking for answers. 
I do take walks and will continue them! Thanks for the reminder about stress. And I send you light and recovery.
xoJB