How do I move forward....

Hi, I’m just new to this website.

I suffered an ectopic pregnancy in June and had my right Fallopian tube removed.

I guess I was lucky as I’m still here to tell the story…

I have days when I’m doing well but a lot of the time I dread the future and trying for another baby. I’m so scared that I won’t fall pregnant again, or if I’ll have another ectopic pregnancy.

My partner is incredibly supportive but I feel so alone because it’s constantly on my mind, and I don’t want to burden him by talking about it all the time.

Does anyone else feel this way?

Thanks xx

Dear Claire-x

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss.

When we experience ectopic pregnancy we are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it’s treatment, reduction in fertility, concerns about the future and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal, putting them together is immense, so yes, your feelings are completely normal.

Can I just say thank you for being brave and reaching out to the Trust. It took me two years to reach out for help and advice. We will all be here for you for as long as you need. I found the support gained extremely helpful in my recovery.

It is completely normal to feel anxious about the future. When thinking about ttc after ectopic pregnancy, we experience a mix of emotions from wanting to try again to being petrified of what may lie ahead. We will never forget but we learn to accept what happened. It is a slow process - might be weeks or months ahead.

In time however, we can get to a place where we feel comfortable trying again. When this is, is individual for each person. There is no timeframe for recovery, take each day as it comes.

Importantly early scans avail for future pregnancies. As soon as you know you are pregnant, contact your local EPU to inform them and book in for an early scan at around six weeks. Remind them of your previous ectopic pregnancy. This self refer route is the best route in our view. Hopefully you will have some comfort to know you are under the radar of medical professionals right away.

It maybe of some comfort to know that the chances of a further ectopic after a first in UK is 10%. So that’s 90% chance of the embryo being in right place next time.

We at the Trust believe that talking through what happened and your emotions as and when you can helps the healing process. We operate a helpline service and there’s no pressure whatsoever but if you would ever like the opportunity to speak over the phone to someone who has been through a similar experience, do feel free to call, details are below. We can take things at your pace entirely and you are free to ask any questions that are on your mind. You can talk about the ordeal you have been through and express your feelings to vent and let off some steam. We can exchange emails too, if you prefer that route. We’ll simply be here for you, however you wish and for as long as you wish.

In addition, you can ask to see a GP at your practice and ask them to explore ways in which you can get help and this can include referrals for “talking therapies” or counselling. We have information on our website about finding counselling services.

The charity Mind may also be of assistance. They have local centres and support groups and can offer services on a means-tested basis or sometimes free. You can find your local centre following this link if that may be useful too: http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/local-minds/

Making the decision to begin trying to conceive is an emotional rollercoaster compounded by our sad loss. Again, you are not alone. We here emotional support whenever you need us. There is a specific TTC board you can look at too whenever feel ready.

Sending much love and warm hugs,

Karen x


If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering?

Further information is available at www.ectopic.org.uk

Email us at ept@ectopic.org.uk.

Our helpline is 020 7733 2653 (available Monday to Friday 10am - 4pm).

Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team.