Feeling lost.

I was pregnant with my 3rd child when I began getting pains on right side. It was ectopic, I have had 2 previous early miscarriages in 2020 too.

The scan also found that I had ovarian cysts on both sides. I had laparoscopic surgery to remove the ectopic pregnancy but I also had the cysts, right tube and ovary removed (ectopic was on right side). I had left tube removed some yrs ago when ttc my first daughter. I’m really struggling with not only losing my baby but losing the chance to conceive again.

I already have 2 beautiful daughters and I am so grateful for this as I know others aren’t always as lucky as me and I am definitely seeing all the positives in what I already have. People are trying to be really supportive by telling me to look at the positives and I am but I still feel so empty.

My grief this time round feels so much more acute. I’m finding everything really difficult. Everything happened so quickly that I’m only just starting to get my head around it all.

Dear Fiona,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and losses,

To experience one loss is difficult, to deal with multiple losses is heart breaking and my heart truly goes out to you. Coupled with the impact of losing both tubes and the impact on fertility, it is no wonder you feel lost.

The feelings of loss and grief are completely normal at this stage, however if the down days start to outweigh the good, we at the Trust believe that talking through what happened and your emotions as and when you can helps the healing process. We operate a helpline service and there’s no pressure whatsoever but if you would ever like the opportunity to speak over the phone to someone who has been through a similar experience, do feel free to call, details are below. We can take things at your pace entirely and you are free to ask any questions that are on your mind. You can talk about the ordeal you have been through and express your feelings to vent and let off some steam. We can exchange emails too, if you prefer that route. We’ll simply be here for you, however you wish and for as long as you wish.

In addition, you can ask to see a GP at your practice and ask them to explore ways in which you can get help and this can include referrals for “talking therapies” or counselling.

We have information on our website about finding counselling services and we have more information here: http://www.ectopic.org.uk/patients/emotional-impact/

The charity Mind may also be of assistance. They have local centres and support groups and can offer services on a means-tested basis or sometimes free. You can find your local centre following this link if that may be useful too: http://www.mind.org.uk/information-supp … al-minds/a

Sending much love and warm hugs,

Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards


During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.

If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?

Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk

Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk

We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653

Take a look at our newsletters and subscribe to our mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/986bdd6091ee/ectopic-matters

Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team