Ectopic pregnancy/ my journey

Amy1007 · 19 January 2023 22:06

Hi. I’m Amy and I’m 26 years old and very recently just had surgery for an ectopic pregnancy. The pregnancy was within my left tube which then ruptured causing me to have both the pregnancy and the tube to be removed.

After finding out I was pregnant at the very beginning of December the first week was fine and all went went well. It was after this stuff began to become difficult and a total rollercoaster of emotions. A week later I went to the toilet in the morning and wiped to see brown discharge I called the doctors and the early pregnancy team who reassured me this was normal in pregnancy. The next day I had heavy bleeding and went to A&E who ran bloods and the doctor told me it could be a miscarriage but not to be disheartened. Getting told you could be loosing your baby is an upsetting and distressing time for anyone.

After leaving a&e I had a call back from early pregnancy who told me to repeat a pregnancy test in 10 days and if this is still positive then call back. Time dragged by but 10 days later and 5 positive pregnancy tests later I phoned early pregnancy and confirmed my positive tests while feeling so happy and relieved my baby was okay. The hospital booked me an early scan for the Wednesday and bloods.

Wednesday came and me and my partner headed to the hospital in hopes that we were getting to see our baby for the first time and getting told everything was fine. The nurse scanned me and confirmed that she couldn’t see anything but I might just have been early on that what I thought. So she took some bloods and sent us on our way and said they would call back with results.

A couple hours passed and they phoned and it was good news the bloods had went up as they should have but she still thought I was just a little earlier than I thought so come back again on Friday for repeat bloods. We went the Friday and the bloods doubled again as they should have. Same again back two days later for bloods which only raised slightly this time so they booked me another scan for the Wednesday. Still nothing to be seen on the scan and more bloods took which this time fell a little but did not half. So the nurses told me this could sometimes happen but in worse case I could be having a miscarriage. The nurse told me I would be back again in 3 days this time for bloods as the 2nd day landed on Christmas Day and they where closed.

Went for bloods and scans and the bloods continued to fall for the next 2 times but only by a very little amount. The nurses and doctors agreed to continue to monitor this.

Friday the 30th December and still no further forward with what was happening to myself and my baby I had a scan which showed a possible an ectopic pregnancy in my left tube and some fluid in my abdomen. I was also experiencing quite heavy vaginal bleeding at this point and in a reasonable amount of pain.

Yet again back and forth to the hospital every second day for bloods and scans until Wednesday the 4th January where I was signed off work due to the pain and discomfort.

The next day the hospital called me with my blood results the bloods had risen again and that’s when I got called in as an emergency for the methotrexate injection. After having the jag I felt unwell that night but put it down to the jag starting to work and tried to sleep it off.

The Friday came and I was feeling awful the whole day unable to leave bed unless it was to use the bathroom, tried my best to get through the pain until I moved for dinner and I turned grey and felt very unwell so decided a trip to A&E was needed. A 4 hour wait in a&e on a Friday night seemed like forever. When I was finally seen by a nurse she said she didn’t think I should have been at home and got straight on the phone to Gynaecology who agreed to see me. After gynaecology had a quick check of my cervix I was sent straight back up the road. Again took painkillers and tried to sleep off the pain.

The next morning I’m barley able to walk with the pain I’m in and knew something wasn’t right. Phoned early pregnancy who called back and sent me straight to A&E. There was only a 20 minute wait this time and straight away I was seen and refereed back to gynaecology who this time helped me a lot! The doctors took me in for a scan and seen the ectopic pregnancy growing in my tube and a significant amount of free fluid in my abdomen and admitted me to the hospital to be monitored overnight.

As this was my first time ever having to stay in a hospital naturally I felt scared, nervous & sad. The nurses made sure they gave me strong pain relief to help and I managed to stay in the hospital the first night with only a couple of tears! The next day after speaking to a doctor he told me I would be there another night just for monitoring.

The Monday came and I thought to myself I’m really not feeling any better the pains bad when the pain relief is wearing off. I shared this with the nurses who then told me if it gets worse they will consult with the doctor about next steps. A few hours went by and I was in more pain this is when the surgeon came and spoke to me about surgery. I agreed to the surgery and knew there was a possible chance I would loose a tube.

My family came to visit about 4pm and stayed to around 9pm. At around 10pm a doctor came in and asked me what do I want to do with my unborn baby if they remove the tube. This totally threw me off and made me quite upset.

The surgery went well and they had to remove both the tube and the baby.

I feel as if im struggling with my feelings towards all this and feeling quite hurt.

EPT_Host_22 · 20 January 2023 07:52

Hi Amy,

I’m so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss. You have had a massive physical and emotional upheaval, and recovery from ectopic pregnancy will take time. Everyone’s path is unique, and there is no set timeframe for emotional recovery. There are no “musts” or “shoulds” or deadlines. Grieve as you wish and cry, vent, and release your emotions as you need.

I found that the first few months were the hardest, as I didn’t fully understand why it happened to me. Slowly, the darkest clouds lifted, and I began to have some ok days and even some good days again sometimes. Recovery is not always a smooth path, however. With time though, I began to accept what had happened, and although we never forget, it is something that is a part of us that we learn to live with.

For me, I found that writing in a journal did help to process the many elements. I recalled elements of the hospital and recovery and found myself thinking about the family and friends who reached out with support. It helped me to get the words out of my head and eventually share them with my partner and close friends. This was important for me because my partner also grieved differently. He thought he would lose me and focused his attention on my well-being. I didn’t see him as distraught over the pregnancy, though that was also happening. The journal helped to bring attention to all the feelings.

Your ectopic pregnancy was so recent and is still early in your recovery. Please allow yourself all the time and space you need to heal and know that you have a supportive environment here for as long as you need. We are here for you any time. These boards are a safe environment to let off steam among people who have been there and understand. Please continue to do so as often as you wish.

With good wishes,

Michele

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

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Sirens97 · 7 March 2023 13:20

Hi Amy,

I’m so sorry to hear this. The same thing happened to me around the same I’m currently 4 weeks post surgery. They removed my right tube. :’(

I’m 25 and had no idea I was pregnant to begin with, until about 2 weeks before everything started going wrong. The whole thing is just a massive shock.

I can’t offer the best advice as I struggle most days and have huge anxiety about the same thing happening again or whether or not I can ever get pregnant again despite all the stats.

Its just made me want to try again as soon as possible 3 months after I’ve recovered physically even though I didn’t really plan on having a baby until 28/29. I don’t think I’ll be happy again until/if I’m lucky enough to have a healthy pregnancy.

I just want you to know that your not on your own, as I’m reading posts this type of thing seems to be more common than I first realised.

I wish you all the best and hopefully we will soon meet our rainbow babies X

Terri8486 · 10 March 2023 21:38

Hi

I have just joined this forum

I had ectopic with ruptured right tube. 3 collapses and Internal bleeding resulted in emergency surgery to remove tube 5 days ago. There was no follow up required and I have been recovering at home. Today I fainted again. No pain in stomach just pain in shoulder which dr said is normal after surgery. I was sent home from a&e as they could not find anything wrong apart from low blood count but not low enough to give me a blood transfusion. Most of today I have overwhelmed with flutters and flushes and feeling of fainting again I just wondered if anyone has had similar symptoms.

Thank you xx

EPT_Host_20 · 12 March 2023 19:39

Dear Terri,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy loss,

You have been through such a lot in such a short space of time which includes the ordeal of surgery.

Generally speaking, you should take it very easy for about six weeks after surgery. Your body will be using its energies to heal internally. It is normal to feel physically and emotionally exhausted during this time so please do be kind to yourself. Recovery can take time and some days will be better than others. One day you may be okay and the next you may be in discomfort or more emotional. This is perfectly usual and the healing process will go back and forth in this way for however long you need. It is important to listen to your body signals. Pain and feeling tired are your body signals to tell you to rest. We suggest keeping a healthy diet drinking lots of water and resting.

Did your medical team discuss treatment for your low blood count if you did not need a transfusion? We do not provide individual medical advice, so I would advise speaking to your medical team again if they did not offer advice or if you feel worse or symptoms do not improve.

Sending much love,

Karen x