I had a 12 week old EP removed last Wednesday, I said I didn’t want my baby’s ashes but now I’m not sure. I think I’m regretting my decision now. I am able to change my mind, am I being morbid for wanting to keep them? Did anyone else keep their baby’s ashes? Xx
Dear Samantha_84,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,
Based on what we hear from others, women are not automatically told as to what happens to the baby once it has been removed after the surgery. How we want to remember our babies or if we would like ashes is a deeply personal feeling so it may be difficult for people to comment upon.
Although this maybe difficult for you to read, there are several guidelines for medical professionals to follow regarding the sensitive treatment of your baby. As a result, many hospitals have adopted arrangements with local crematoria for the sensitive disposal but they are guidelines, and procedures vary from hospital to hospital.
If you are unsure how you feel, I would speak urgently to the bereavement services or the Patient Advice Liaison Services (PALS) at your local hospital to see if they can assist you any further.
Sending much love,
Karen x
The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
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