Hi all,
I’m now 35. Have a 2 year old and have been TTC my second for a year and three months. After two miscarriages and an ectopic pregnancy I have had every test under the sun performed and they have all come back normal except I have a lower than average AMH for my age which means my time is more limited. My specialist has recommended IVF. My hycosy came back clear for both sides however they suspect cilia in tube to be damaged.
Although I am scared I am thankful to have another option to move on towards. After a year of loss, grief and anxiety I feel like I am ready to try something different. I know that nothing is guaranteed and that it is going to be a roller coaster but I feel like Im ready. So one month to go before treatment.
Has anyone got any advice for me? I am likely going to be going IVF with PGD based on doctor recommendations and assessment of my situation and previously pregnancy losses. I’m completely new to all of this so anything will be helpful.
Thanks in advance for any advice you can give 
Hi sadnessandgrief,
Firstly i am truly sorry to hear of what you have been through with your miscarriages and ectopic. I have been through this myself so i do understand your pain and grief. Its a terrible thing to experience and the emotional and physical pain is indescribable. Some of your situation sounds similar to my own although sadly I do not yet have any children. I am 34 and fertility wise all tests came back as normal apart from a lower amh level like yourself.
I have had 3 fresh cycles of ivf and one frozen cycle so feel like I’m a bit of a pro when it comes to ivf . Out of the 3 fresh cycles I have fallen pregnant twice, once last year and once this year. Sadly I suffered a miscarriage last year and 6 weeks ago an ectopic pregnancy. The doctors have told me that these losses are simply bad luck and nothing to do with either me or the ivf.
I have joined this site to reach out to other ladies who have been through the same as I have been really struggling and feel like other people don’t really understand how bad it feels.
To try and answer your question i would say that Ivf itself can be a rollercoaster of emotions and it’s a lot to take it with all the meds and scans etc but the whole process moves along quite quickly and before you know it all the procedural parts are done and your in the dreaded 2 week wait for the results (think that’s the worse part! I always felt so impatient)
I would say try and keep as relaxed and calm as you can, be kind to yourself and take time out for yourself and partner. Ivf has been effective for me and I’m sure it will for you as well. I was initially very apprehensive before starting ivf but I’m glad that I did it as i think it just helps things along and can be very successful.
If you have any other questions I’d be more that happy to try and help. I had so many questions when I first started!
Big hugs to you x
Hi Sadnessandgrief and AllyM26,
I was so, so sorry to hear of both your troubles. Miscarriages and EPs are so traumatic to go through, particularly when they’re followed by more of the unknown in the form of IVF. I’m a bit of a newbie to IVF too but more than happy to offer support and advice (and receive them too!) if it’s helpful.
I must admit that I’ve not found the process to be swift; we had our initial (private) consultation back in November, kicked off drugs in January and had a fresh embryo transferred in March. Sadly the pregnancy didn’t last, but I’m assured by doctors that it’s a promising place to begin. I had to wait for a couple of periods to pass so we’re only just kicking off the second cycle - a frozen embryo transfer as part of my natural cycle - so that should hopefully take place within the next couple of weeks.
In terms of my (very limited) experience so far, I’d recommend taking up counselling if it’s offered and also keeping your diary free so that you can do exactly as you please, day by day. I was very wobbly; partially due to the hormones, and partially being completely overwhelmed by the gravity of the situation. The consultations and scans are demanding and time consuming plus the drugs can make you fatigued and under the weather, so don’t be hard on yourself if you have to bail on arrangements; hopefully any flakey behaviour will all become clear when you get what you want!
Also, I found reflexology improved my rate of recovery considerably - I had it just before and just after egg harvest (which in my case was uncomfortable due to OHSS and a sizeable cyst), and I noticed the stark contrast (less swelling, better ability to manage pain) against previous miscarriages and my ruptured EP.
Other than that, simply do whatever you can to stay sane and indulge yourself (in a fertility-friendly way, obvs)! I’m sure you’ll already be eating your greens and lean protein, and downward-dogging all the way to the clinic, so I wish you all the best. I’ll be checking in online in the weeks to come so feel free to pipe up if you need some support.
Take care xxx