Dear Terri,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy loss,
We hear from many women who struggle with news about pregnancy from their friends and families. This is very normal and I was the same after my loss. When I had my ectopic pregnancy I had to attend a family function and a close family member was heavily pregnant. I spent the whole day and evening avoiding her as I found it too hard to be near her. It’s what I needed to do to get through the day and have some space and please protect your heart in whatever way you need. This does not make us “bad” people and it is possible to be happy for those around us while grieving for our own loss. Pregnancies and babies can be a very stark reminder of what could have been and it can be painful. Please do be gentle with yourself and you can talk to us whenever you need.
I completely understand the urge to conceive following baby loss, I think many people do. Ectopic pregnancy can be very traumatic for our loved ones watching it unfold.
What you can say to your loved ones is that following an ectopic pregnancy, it is advised to have an early pregnancy scan at around 6 weeks. This is so any possible complications can be monitored and caught early before any possible emergency situations arise. This may help to reassure fears of worries they may have.
We also have more information on concieving following ectopic pregnancy on our website and there is also a specific Mens board on these forums your family members can look at for support if they wish. Even just reading other partners experiences and views can sometimes help and be supportive.
Above all, keep talking with your loved ones, telling them how you feel, listening to their concerns, use our website for support and information and keep that open dialog going. We will be here for you for as long as you need,
Sending much love,
Karen x
The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
Registered Charity Number: 1071811
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