Hi.
I first used this board in Summer 2021 when my first pregnancy was ectopic in right tube.
To give some background, we fell pregnant on our honeymoon after the first attempt trying - this was to my complete amazement as I have irregular periods and PCOS, thank goodness for ovulation test strips! It was a sad process of repeated hospital visits to check HCG levels and ultimately ending the pregnancy using MTX. I did feel in some way reassured that I had been able to concieve so easily and that brought me some comfort and hope for trying again. Still, it felt like really bad luck after already going through 18 months of bad luck having our wedding postponed 3 times due to the COVID pandemic! 
. We were advised to wait 6 months which was probably the most frustrating part tbh as I already felt life plans had been delayed massively. I did a lot of research and opted to try again after 4.5 months, there’s conflicting guidance within the UK whether the washout period should be 3 or 6 months so I went for the middle! But I refrain from giving advice, this is just stating what we did 
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We were very fortunate and I fell pregnant again at the start of 2022 after 2nd cycle of trying. I actually didn’t have anxiety because I really told myself that although risk of re-currence is elevated, there was 90% chance of non-ectopic and I couldn’t possibly have another run of bad luck! Well… I am a very unlucky person and indeed my right tube failed again. I’ll skip over the details but it was quite a lengthy process of being a 'pregnancy of unknown location ’ and handed back and forth to different Doctors & nurses who didn’t know what to do with me after inconclusive HCG tests and multiple scans that seemed to go on forever. Ultimately, I reluctantly ended up having an ‘exploratory’ salpingectomy and had pre-signed a form to give permission to remove my right tube if the surgeon could clearly identify an ectopic pregnancy - which they did and I was signed off work for a few weeks.
I was so caught up in “resolving” the 2nd ectopic that after the surgery and being officially discharged from further care, only then did it really hit home that I’d lost another pregnancy and was facing an uncertain future now being a ‘recurrent’ ectopic patient. I still remember clearly the first night at home after surgery, my husband and I cuddled on the sofa and both broke down mourning our loss for a second time. Cries thinking about this 
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The next 6 months post 2nd ectopic were really hard mentally, and if I’m honest, the saddest time of my life to date. It felt like everyone around me was getting pregnant, having baby showers or giving birth. Inside I was feeling very bitter but I tried hard not to show this. Everyone is different but my way of getting by was to throw myself into a new challenging role at work, and plan lots of weekend activities and holidays - keeping busy keeps my mind occupied . I struggled on how to move forward, and during this time paid to have a hycosy on left tube which looked to be clear (note: the surgeon had also confirmed this during my tube removal). Still, none of the medical professionals I saw could conclusively say that my left tube would be fine, and cautioned that although unlikely, my risk of re-currence was still elevated because of two prior ectopics. In the end, to the surprise of my husband, parents and friends I was adamant on going down the IVF route as I just felt mentally I couldn’t deal with the anxiety and risk of trying the left tube. We began IVF in Nov 2022 after a fun and adventurous summer just focusing on enjoying life in the present moment.
I’ll fast forward and skip the details (but happy to answer any in the comments ).. our luck from here on changed and our first round of IVF resulted in a very smooth and successful pregnancy. My first son was born Summer 2023 and is now a delightful 20 month old that brings us so much joy every day. We decided to try again when he turned 1 and by this point my confidence had increased that I was able to tolerate the idea of trying naturally on my left side. We were incredibly fortunate that I fell pregnant again after 2 cycles of trying (I deliberately say cycles and not months because my cycles are irregular, thank goodness for ovulation test strips!!!). All was well and the 6 week scan showed a viable uterine pregnancy yaaayy!! I am now 38 weeks pregnant and looking forward to giving birth to our second son. We feel very blessed 
By sharing my story I hope this can bring comfort and reassurance to others who may be going through times of difficulty, anxiety or darkness. It can feel like a completely hopeless situation and the uncertainty very difficult to navigate, especially in the cases of 2+ ectopics or tube removal. My advice: keep busy, active, continue to enjoy life and socialize with family & friends whilst things work they’re way out . Take comfort that you were able to conceive and therefore chances of conceiving again are good. Try not to have a fixed plan or fixed timelines (I’m guilty of this!), a better idea is to have a general goal and be prepared to be flexible. I’ve since had to learn this even more because my birth plan and feeding plan didn’t happen the way I wanted!
Wishing you the best of luck x x x