Looking for positive stories after 2 ectopic pregnancies

Hi everyone, my first time posting on something like this, but I am after hopeful and positive stories after suffering 2 ectopic pregnancies. Sending huge waves of love to anyone who finds themselves in a similar position and I hope that if some responses are posted to this thread, that they might also help you find some comfort.

This is my story. I’m 33 and last year my husband and I started trying for our first baby in February before anyone knew of the pandemic that was to come. Luckily I fell pregnant straight away, which was a surprise but also scary as we had just moved to a bigger house taken a risk on upping our mortgage and then both lost our jobs due to the virus. We barely had time to get our heads around all the change when I knew things weren’t right and I was referred to the EPU. After much back and forth and multiple blood tests an ectopic pregnancy was confirmed in my left tube. I didn’t need to have any treatment and was able to undergo expectant management. At the time I didn’t know how to feel, our lives had changed so quickly on every level, but my overwhelming sensation was one of fear that it had happened, sadness for what could have been, but also hope that it wouldn’t happen again even though I knew there was more a of risk of a second ectopic.

After that we made the decision to stop trying for a while to give me a chance to recover but also for one of us to find work. I got a job at the the start of this year and my husband picked up a lot of freelance work and we made the decision to start trying again. Luckily I fell pregnant on my second cycle, almost a year to the day after our first ectopic, but then again almost on the same timescale I started bleeding and my GP sent me off to the hospital yesterday. I was scanned immediately which I was so grateful for but sadly a second ectopic was confirmed in my left tube and I’m back to the hospital tomorrow for another blood test and next steps in terms of any treatment.

I don’t know what to say other than I feel utterly devastated and also a bit naive. My brain and anxiety are getting the better of me and I feel so scared and physically panicked about the possibility of a life without children. I have the most incredible husband at my side and we are madly in love so I know I’m very lucky but also children with him is something I desperately want. One thing I do have is hope and a positive mental attitude but it’s really taking a battering at the moment, so please do share your stories of hope after ectopic pregnancies particularly if sadly like me you’ve had more than one, I would find it so helpful particularly at the moment. Thank you and stay positive and safe everyone x

I’m so sorry you’ve been through this not once but twice. I remember trawling these sites looking for positive stories of people who went on to have a successful pregnancy.

I had an ectopic in February in my left tube which was removed with surgery as it had started to rupture. No one can prepare you for the heartbreak or fear of never having a child you so desperately wanted. But if I can offer some hope I’m now almost 8 weeks pregnant! I’ve had an early scan and it’s in the right place and we saw the heartbeat. It might not feel like it now but there is light at the end of the tunnel

Thank you so much for the reply and congratulations on your news it must be such a relief. Stories like this are so wonderful to hear and give such hope. Wishing you all the best for the rest of your pregnancy x

Dear Lanterns,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancies and losses. To experience one loss is difficult to deal with multiple losses is heartbreaking and my heart truly goes out to you.

We certainly hear from women who have successfully conceived following multiple ectopic pregnancies. When you feel ready, feel free to read some of the older board posts and I hope you will find comfort in the positive stories.

Above all be kind to yourself and allow time to grieve,to heal both physically and emotionally. We will be here for you for as long as you need,

Sending much love and warm hugs,

Karen x

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