Hi everyone, my first time posting on something like this, but I am after hopeful and positive stories after suffering 2 ectopic pregnancies. Sending huge waves of love to anyone who finds themselves in a similar position and I hope that if some responses are posted to this thread, that they might also help you find some comfort.
This is my story. I’m 33 and last year my husband and I started trying for our first baby in February before anyone knew of the pandemic that was to come. Luckily I fell pregnant straight away, which was a surprise but also scary as we had just moved to a bigger house taken a risk on upping our mortgage and then both lost our jobs due to the virus. We barely had time to get our heads around all the change when I knew things weren’t right and I was referred to the EPU. After much back and forth and multiple blood tests an ectopic pregnancy was confirmed in my left tube. I didn’t need to have any treatment and was able to undergo expectant management. At the time I didn’t know how to feel, our lives had changed so quickly on every level, but my overwhelming sensation was one of fear that it had happened, sadness for what could have been, but also hope that it wouldn’t happen again even though I knew there was more a of risk of a second ectopic.
After that we made the decision to stop trying for a while to give me a chance to recover but also for one of us to find work. I got a job at the the start of this year and my husband picked up a lot of freelance work and we made the decision to start trying again. Luckily I fell pregnant on my second cycle, almost a year to the day after our first ectopic, but then again almost on the same timescale I started bleeding and my GP sent me off to the hospital yesterday. I was scanned immediately which I was so grateful for but sadly a second ectopic was confirmed in my left tube and I’m back to the hospital tomorrow for another blood test and next steps in terms of any treatment.
I don’t know what to say other than I feel utterly devastated and also a bit naive. My brain and anxiety are getting the better of me and I feel so scared and physically panicked about the possibility of a life without children. I have the most incredible husband at my side and we are madly in love so I know I’m very lucky but also children with him is something I desperately want. One thing I do have is hope and a positive mental attitude but it’s really taking a battering at the moment, so please do share your stories of hope after ectopic pregnancies particularly if sadly like me you’ve had more than one, I would find it so helpful particularly at the moment. Thank you and stay positive and safe everyone x