Trying again

Preparing For Your Next Pregnancy
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It’s now been 2 months since I had my keyhole surgery…I felt like I was doing well and had a normal period and started trying again (I know the official advice is 2 periods but I couldn’t see a medical reason why not). Anyway, we didn’t get pregnant this month and now im having the biggest wave of grief. I mourned the loss at the time of course and found this site helpful but the disappointment of not being pregnant again (we tried for 6 months before having the ectopic which I know is not ages but im 34 and have no other children)…it’s just awful. Im dreaming about babies and pregnancies all the time it seems and my friends I see the most have young babies and kids atm. I just feel so sad and hard done by.

Not really a question but just a moan. I was a nightmare to my bf with terrible PMT yesterday too. Feeling so guilty and just unhappy really. I have a good life and lots of things to feel lucky for but this all just feels like the worst luck and I won’t be happy until I have a baby.

Sending love to all of you who have similar pains xxx

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Hi Ljmp36,

I’m so sorry to hear about your ectopic pregnancy and loss. Experiencing an ectopic pregnancy is both a physical and emotional trauma. It is very normal to have waves of emotion following the experience.

There is no set pathway for recovery and for every woman it is very unique. The boards here are filled with women and men who are, sadly, bound by these experiences. These are safe spaces for you to share your thoughts, ask questions, and just vent. They are also filled with positive stories which can help heal the pain and move you forward.

Our physical recovery is often quicker than our emotional recovery. It is one of the reasons for the wait in TTC, to be able to properly date the last menstrual cycle, but also to allow additional time for emotions to surface. It is also very natural to feel a mix of emotions when seeing other people with pregnancies and children. We can feel happy for them, but we also are grieving our own loss and what might have been. Please be kind to yourself and take the TTC in your own time and as you feel able.

If you would like to talk, our team is available via email or phone at the contact details below. I want you to know that we are here for you throughout this journey.

With good wishes,

Michele

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

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Further information is available on our website.

Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk

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Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team

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Thank you Michele - I only just saw this and your kind reply bought a tear to my eye xxx