Tips for healing after emergency surgery

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Hi everyone,

I had emergency surgery last weekend after my ectopic ruptured - I was being closely monitored after my first dose of methotrexate and my levels had just started to drop, but went from mild cramps and bleeding to extreme pain and dizziness incredibly suddenly and knew straight away I must have ruptured. I had a pretty scary experience - 999 handler refused to send an ambulance, and after a friend drove us to A+E I waited over an hour before seeing a doctor. I was visiting a friend so was away from my local hospital, and despite brandishing my medical notes and explaining I had an ectopic it felt I wasn’t taken seriously until my heart rate dropped to 30 and my blood pressure dipped dramatically. By the time they operated I’d lost a litre and a half of blood and needed a transfusion, but thankfully only had my tube removed during keyhole surgery. I was eventually discharged on Tuesday and am now recovering at home, and have managed a few short walks out with my husband and friends.

My questions are two-fold - does anyone have any tips for the physical recovery? Anything major to avoid? I’ve read all the literature and know it’s a case of gradually building up activity and listening to my body, but all tips gratefully received!

Secondly, what has helped you cope emotionally? Having the limbo of expectant and medical management followed by emergency surgery I feel some relief that I’m not waiting for anything else to happen, but definitely feeling the toll of everything that has happened over the past few weeks. I’m trying to feel what I need to feel while avoiding getting to wrapped up in the trauma of the emergency situation, but also want to take some practical steps such as complaining about 999 call handling procedure and my A&E experience. I also am in the process of taking some study leave from my job in order to write a Master’s dissertation, and I’m desperate to do a good job on it and not let this experience ruin something I’ve worked really hard for, so any tips on getting concentration back also gratefully received!

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Dear Sunflower,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy loss and everything you have been through. From your own words I can only imagine what a frightening experience this must have been and I am so sorry you have been through all of this.

Experiencing an ectopic pregnancy is a huge ordeal and you are in the early stages of recovery. Your body needs time to heal from your surgery which is in itself a gruelling task. You have also had to process the loss of your baby and been through an immense rollercoaster of emotions - all of this will take time to come to terms with.

You should take it very easily for about six weeks after surgery. Your body will be using its energies to heal internally. It is normal to feel physically and emotionally exhausted during this time and please do be kind to yourself. Recovery can take time and some days will be better than others, one day you maybe ok and the next you maybe in discomfort or more emotional. This is perfectly usual and the healing process will go back and forth in this way for however long you need. It is important to listen to your body’s signals and pain and feeling tired are your body’s signs to tell you to rest. We suggest keeping a healthy balanced diet, drinking lots of water and resting. Once your wounds have healed, very gentle exercise such as a short walk can help, but please do take this slowly.

We have more information on our website about physical and emotional recovery which I have added here-

https://ectopic.org.uk/physical-recovery

https://ectopic.org.uk/emotional-recovery

Above all be kind to yourself and allow time to grieve and to heal both physically and emotionally.I

We will be here for you for as long as you need,

Sending much love,

Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

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Hiya,

I’m so sorry for what you’ve been through. I’m shocked at the way you were dismissed by the call handler and a+E. I myself am medical and it was ingrained in my training that ectopic is a medical emergency.

I was also dismissed a little initially and don’t think things were handled well either - gynae team sent me away for a week after my initial ectopic concerns and when I went back it was too late for methotrexate and I had to go to surgery that day. We decided not to complain because we wanted to leave it behind us - and it wasn’t drastically unsafe - however, the way you were treated was and I think you should complain if you want to.

My surgery was 9 weeks ago now so I’m in a very different stage. I think my tips for recovery initially are to really let yourself rest, rely on the people around you to support you and for me journalling helped as a way of releasing some of the grief. I cried a lot the first couple of weeks and then started to feel much better soon after that and did go back to work - work were kind to me which helped. Because I couldn’t exercise which I enjoy I let myself indulge in some retail therapy and bought some nice clothes. We planned a fun dinner out for once I was properly recovered after about a month I think.

Trying to conceive again this month has been quite triggering and the sadness has come back - but these things come in waves I guess.

Talk about it with people if you can.

I think this site is great too

Sending you lots of love and heal well xxx

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Thank you both for your kind words and advice. I have been taking it easy, with short walks to get out of the house and start to get out and about again. Pain definitely easing, and emotional side of things coming and going as I expected!

Ljmp36 - sorry to hear you also had negative experiences. I’m definitely planning on making a complaint about the call handler and A+E when it feels slightly less raw. Seems 999 protocols need revising if someone with known ectopic and clear signs of rupture isn’t taken seriously! Things ended about as well as they could have done in that I managed to have keyhole and only lost one tube, but can’t help but wonder if I would have needed the blood transfusion if I’d been treated more quickly. Annoyed not just because of the terrifying experience, but also I am pretty gutted that I can never give blood again!