Recovery- what time expect

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Hi everyone,

I hope you are all keeping well in the covid chaos!

So here is my story I’m sorry it’s a bit long! I did try to keep it brief :?

We found out I was pregnant in mid March and had the usual excitement. It was planned and was my pregnancy.

Last Friday (at 6w 5d) I had some cramping which was mild-moderate but was defiantly focused on the right hand side. I had previously had a very very light amount of dark brown spotting about a week before. At first I thought I was just being a hypochondriac but the cramping was still there the next morning so I called the early pregnancy unit and they told me to come in. They took blood and did an internal exam which looked normal and they booked me for a scan the next day. The next day they scanned me and I was told that the pregnancy was ectopic in my right tube. I was given a shot of methotrexate. The next four days I found very difficult coming to terms with what was happening, living in fear of rupture and not know what was going on. On day 4 I went to have my bloods taken but the nurse was worried that my pain on my right had increased, spread to my side and back and down my right leg. They did another scan and found fluid in my abdomen, this plus the fact my levels had risen (2100 on the sat appointment, 3600 on sun appointment and 4950 on the thurs appointment) meant that the consultant recommended surgery to have the tube removed. I had this surgery yesterday and have just been allowed home.

My question to anyone who might be able to help is what to expect next? The last week has been such a blur. We went from excitement about our first child, to dealing with the news it was ectopic, to living in the uncertainty of methotrexate, to being admitted for emergency surgery and it kind of being over but not. I’m feeling very confused and would like to hear of what other people experienced once the dust on everything settled?

X x x

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Hi j_russell,

I am so sorry to hear that you have suffered an ectopic pregnancy and loss. I’m glad you have found your way to these boards, as they are filled with women and men who understand the experience. You’ve been through so much in a short amount of time, and I can imagine there are different feelings and emotions you may be having. It’s most important to look after yourself right now. You’ve been through both physical and emotional trauma, and it’s important to take time to heal from these. Each woman is unique in her recovery, and there is no set time period or process.

Please be patient with yourself and give yourself the time to heal. Take all the time you need. There is no set time for which to move through these emotions, and every woman and couple go through at their own pace. As well, If you think it may help, we can certainly arrange to speak to you about what you have been through and be a shoulder to lean on. My colleagues and I have also experienced ectopic pregnancies and understand how heartbreaking it is. You can ask any questions or simply tell us about the horrible time you have been through. You can also look at counseling services and emotional recovery support on our website under Patients/Emotional recovery.

Know that we are here for you throughout your recovery, whether you have questions or want to vent. We are here for as long as you need.

With good wishes,

Michele

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards

During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.

If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?

Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk

Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk

We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653

Take a look at our newsletters and subscribe to our mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/986bdd6091ee/ectopic-matters

Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team

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Hi j_russell

Sorry to hear about your loss and all the confusion that came with it. I can relate somewhat. I suffered a miscarriage and an ectopic over an 18month period whilst trying for my first child. Good news is a fell pregnant 4 months after the the ectopic and that pregnancy was happy and healthy and my 2.5year old son is just amazing.

We’ve been trying to expand our family since September 2018 and experienced a miscarriage at 6 weeks on June 2019 and another miscarriage in Jan 2020. You’d think we’d have had our ‘bad luck’ but I started experiencing spotting and terrible pains in my lower abdomon (especially by my right tube where I had the previous ectopic) so I went to the gp who diagnosed me with a pelvis infection ( I didn’t know or even think I was pregnant again at this point). It was only when the pain didn’t go away with the antibiotics that I took a pregnancy test, more so just to rule it out, so I was shocked and a little horrified to see I was in fact pregnant (horrified due to pain and bleeding so not very confident it was there to stay)

And then a bit like you, I went from random pain to being told I had an infection to finding out I was pregnant, to being admitted to a&e for suspected ectopic but then to be told me levels were rising, to seeing nothing on thr ultrasound and then being told I had to make the decision between methotrexate or surgery (all by myself as no husband allowed in hospital due to covid) all in the space of 48 hours!

I’m currently at home feel mostly OK but am still getting daily ‘episodes’ of the most horrendous pain imaginable for an hour or so where I just curl up in a ball and pray for it to subside. My 4 days bloods are tomorrow and I’m hoping they are lowering, if not, I think I may just opt for surgery and be done with it. My previous track record with fertility wasn’t great what with 6 pregnancies and only 1 healthy (not that I’m moaning about that, i know how blessed we are to have him).

Sorry for the long story /rant but just wanted you know I’m so confused and scared and things happened so quickly I don’t even know if I’ve registered it all yet. As hard as it feels now, my son is proof a healthy pregnancy can happen after ectopic, especially as this is your first.

My consultant said to me that whilst a tube is lost with surgery the recovery isn’t too long and cycles tend to return to normal relatively quickly whereas with methotrexate you retain the tube but cycles can take longer to return, you can’t try again for 3 months and it can pretty nasty with all the side effects (starting to feel like I chose the wrong option!!!)

Hear if you ever need to rant or be angry, upset or whatever you feel. Hope you start to feel better soon xxx

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Hi Saimes5 & Michele

Thank you so much for your reply and sorry it has taken me a while to reply. The last two weeks have been emotionally quite tough but I am finally starting to process what has happened.

I find it hard to work out where my emotionally recovery is in context of my physical recover. With the physical side my family is quite a ‘get on with it’ kind of family who say that ‘women have c-sections and recover whilst look after a baby’ which I suppose is true but I feel like I have to push myself, I’ve been cooking and cleaning etc but I’m starting to to get really tired and sore. Just trying to balance expectations with recovery and it’s a but tricky.

@ Saimes5 I am really sorry to hear about your experience, it can be so confusing when everything happens so fast. I hope your bloods levels dropped ok and you were able to recover well, do let me know how you are doing if you get a moment.

Thanks both for your kind support x x x