Hi all,
I am currently 3 weeks post op for the removal of my ectopic after the injection didn’t work. I was also diagnosed with endometriosis. My 18 year old sister announced her pregnancy a week after my op.
Ive had to remove her from all my social medias because i can’t handle seeing her pregnant. I genuinely feel hatred towards this baby which makes me feel worse because i dont want to. I just feel so lonely and like the world is against me. 
Dear crystals-starr,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,
When we experience ectopic pregnancy we are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it’s treatment, reduction in fertility, concerns about the future and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal, putting them together is immense and your feelings are completely normal. It is still so early for you Thatcher feelings are very raw.
We hear from many women who struggle with news about pregnancy from their friends and families. This is very normal and I was the same after my loss. When I had my ectopic pregnancy I had to attend a family function and a close family member was heavily pregnant. I spent the whole day and evening avoiding her as I found it too hard to be near her. It’s what I needed to do to get through the day and have some space and please protect your heart in whatever way you need. This does not make us “bad” people and it is possible to be happy for those around us while grieving for our own loss. Pregnancies and babies can be a very stark reminder of what could have been and it can be painful. Perhaps in time you can speak to her about how you are feeling and so she has more of an understanding to be more considerate towards your needs rather than blocking her altogether. This will take time and I would only suggest doing this when you are ready.
There is no timeframe for recovery, take each day as it comes. Please do be gentle with yourself and you can talk to us whenever you need.
Sending much love,
Karen x
The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
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Sorry to hear that Crystal, it is really hard and take the time you need but it is your sister - I don’t know the nature of your relationship, but hopefully it is one in which you can be honest about how you are feeling? Your sister is very young though and to be honest when I was 18 (and even when I was probably 25) I may have had a limited understanding of how women who suffered pregnancy loss may feel.
It’s normal though - I didn’t even know if I wanted children for sure, but since my ectopic I have found it very hard to be around pregnant women. It depends who - one of my oldest friends I spent a lot of time with after my ectopic, and her baby, and I wasn’t at all bothered by this for some reason. However, women I know less well or don’t know at all I have found difficult. And it has been months since my ectopic.