Hi I recently going thru an ectopic pregnancy, I was admitted an treated in hospital with the injection. I can’t help but blame myself, I’m very emotional an feel i could break at any minute. It’s such a painful thing to go through, an I don’t know where to turn, what to do to stop this hurting. It would be good to talk to ppl who have or are going through this that can understand an maybe offer support.
Dear Louise86,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,
When we experience ectopic pregnancy we are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it’s treatment, reduction in fertility, concerns about the future and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal, putting them together is immense and your feelings are completely normal.
There is no time frame for how long it takes us to heal emotionally and it is completely normal to feel anxious about the future. We will never forget our pregnancy or babies but we can learn to accept what has happened and crucially understand that it wasn’t our fault.
I know that when I had my ectopic pregnancy I also looked for a reason and almost automatically we tend to blame ourselves. From the bottom of my heart, there is nothing you could have done to prevent the ectopic pregnancy from happening. I cannot emphasise enough - you are not to blame. Please be kind to yourself and I send you gentle hugs.
Many women experience feelings of isolation after an ectopic pregnancy - I did, too. It is a frightening experience. Like you, I reached out to the Trust for support and we will be here for you to lean on for as long as you need.
I found comfort reading posts from other ladies, it made me feel less alone. You may also get more replies if you post on our main board as it is the most active board.
Above all be kind to yourself and allow time to grieve, to heal both physically and emotionally.
Sending much love,
Karen x
The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
Registered Charity Number: 1071811
Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards
During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.
If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?
Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk
Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk
We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653
Take a look at our newsletters and subscribe to our mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/986bdd6091ee/ectopic-matters
Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team
Hi Karen thanks for your kind words, it’s not an easy thing to go through but I’m hoping given time it will heal. I just don’t want my baby to be forgotten, I have a bracelet an a locket that is for my memory. An I have some amazing support from my friends an family, but I just don’t wanna put it all on them. I just feel like am failing with my other children cos I can’t get my head round all this, an grieve like I should.
Dear LouiseC86,
You are in no way a failure. It is difficult finding time to continue with family life whilst dealing with a traumatic event and coping with the loss of our babies.
I had counselling after my ectopic pregnancy and my counsellor mentioned something that has always stuck with me.
Don’t spend time and energy worrying about what you are not doing. Focus on the small daily achievements (no matter how small and insignificant they may be). It is also ok not to do everything you did before your ectopic pregnancy. Just being present with your family is enough. You are enough.
Sending much love and warm hugs,
Karen x
The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
Registered Charity Number: 1071811
Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards
During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.
If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?
Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk
Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk
We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653
Take a look at our newsletters and subscribe to our mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/986bdd6091ee/ectopic-matters
Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team