miscarriage after an ectopic ....

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Hii everyone

I am 27 years old Indian housewife who used to work in Samsung as a software engineer before marriage. Here i am sharing my experience of pregnancies just to sympathize myself by sharing my thoughts.

I got married to my prince charming( Arpit ) on 28 April 2018. we got pregnant after an year of marriage. I tested on 7 may 2019 (my father’s b’day ) and it was positive. Everyone was happy as it was supposed to be the first child in our joint family . Days passed and it was the day for my first ultrasound. both of us were excited to see the baby for the first time. However it couldn’t happen as there was nothing visible in scan. doctor said as it has been just 5 weeks of pregnancy so come after 15 days for another scan. And now the real story begins…

it was 3rd June when for the first time i experienced lower abdomen pain. I thought its natural to be in pain during pregnancy. Luckily i was fine within 5 minutes. There was a housewarming function at our inlaws place on 6 June n it was hell hot that day. Next day in the morning i woke up at 5:30 out of pelvic pain and told my husband to accompany me to the washroom as i was unable to walk. As we approached i fainted on the floor. We thought as i had attended a function last day and ate something which has not suited me. The pain was increasing and there was a sharp shoulder pain . I was rushed to the hospital in afternoon when the doctor told it was the case of RUPTURED ECTOPIC PREGNANCY . Already i had lost 250ml blood in internal bleeding and needs to be operated soon. Everyone was devastated by the news . I was taken in OT for laparoscopic surgery at 9:30 p.m . The surgery went fine . I was recovered within a week physically but mentally it took a long time…

As time passed again i got pregnant in december. I tested on 27 Dec 2019 and it was positive :smiley: . All wew happy again as it was a new hope…

But deep inside there was a fear in me for another ectopic . doctor called me for TVS scan on 1 january 2020. I was happy as it was my engagement day as well. But my fear came true . After TVS scan doctor was not sure wether it was ectopic or not so she took a blood sample for beta-HCG. The count was 343. She advised me to get it done after 48 hrs. The test was done again and the count dropped to 194 :frowning: . It was a MISCARRIAGE…

It has been 3 months now. On 25 February 2020, my husband’s younger brother got married an his wife is a month pregnant . I don’t know what to do. I am feeling insecure. I have lost all hopes. I can’t see my mother in law who used to pamper me like her daughter is giving more importance to her. Everyone is taking care of her only. I am dying every day inside silently…

HOW CAN GOD BE SO RUDE TO SOMEONE…

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Hi Rashika,

I’m so very sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and losses. It can be a very confusing time and brings up so many emotions which we may not have expected. You have suffered physical and emotional trauma, and right now, it is so important to look after yourself. There is no standard recovery process, as each of us is unique, however as you’ve read these boards are full of men and women who understand the challenges of ectopic pregnancies.

It’s important to remember that there is nothing you did to cause or could have done to stop an ectopic pregnancy and miscarriage. Right now, the most important thing to do is to look after yourself. There is no set recovery or set timeframe for recovery. As every women is unique, we all process it in different ways. Some days are better and some days are harder. Over time, the initial feelings may fade, but we don’t forget. Your well-being is the most important thing right now.

I found that journaling was a way for me to get my thoughts onto paper, helping me to make sense of my emotions and to share them with friends and family. The Trust also believes that talking therapies can be of great help. You may want to speak to your GP for a referral and a look into counselling or to contact your local Mind centres. We can also arrange for you to speak to someone on our helpline at the number below. Many find it of comfort to speak to someone who has been through the same thing and we can support you alongside the counseling. You will also find more information for support on our website: http://www.ectopic.org.uk/patients/emotional-impact/

Please know that these boards are here for you, any time, to share or to vent for as long as you need.

With good wishes,

Michele

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards

During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.

If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?

Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk

Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk

We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653

Take a look at our newsletters and subscribe to our mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/986bdd6091ee/ectopic-matters

Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team