Lessons after Ectopic Surgery

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10 days ago I had laparoscopy surgery to remove my right fallopian tube after an ectopic pregnancy was discovered. It was my first pregnancy and I’m heartbroken.

I’m still very early on this journey but wanted to share my learnings and tips and tricks on what to expect after the surgery incase they might help someone else in the future and also as a bit of a cathartic exercise for me I guess!

Hopefully people will add and expand on this list as not everything I have done will work for everyone!

  • If your surgeon says you are well enough to leave the same day then do, the pain and discomfort will be worse the next morning once the strong painkillers have worn off and it felt so much nicer to wake up in my own bed/house to begin the recovery process

  • Take loose clothing to put on after the surgery, I took baggy leggings and a t-shirt that I left hospital in and got straight into bed when I got home so I didn’t have to change

  • Something that surprised me was the pain I felt in my shoulders and top of my back - apparently during the surgery they inflate your stomach so this was just gas working it’s way out of the body and subsided in about 48 hours

  • Don’t be worried about going to see a nurse to have them check and change your dressings even if anything seems ok. I’ve been twice since and it’s been nice to get that piece of mind that everything is healing correctly

  • If you want to see/speak to people then do, if you don’t then don’t be afraid to say no to people - do what makes you feel comfortable. People will want to come and check you are ok but for me for a week I didn’t want that as I was too emotional

  • You will bleed a few days after the surgery which is apparently the uterine lining coming out, this felt like really bad period pains and I passed some not very nice things. This will ease though and is all part of the process. Have some pads ready that you can use for when this starts as tampons are not advised due to infection.

  • I have found setting myself some short term goals has helped me so for instance this month I’d like to have among others stopped bleeding, removed all bandages from my incisions, gone for a run, started tracking my temperature and cycle again, started my first period. Obviously not all in my control but just things for me to tick off as and when they happen that will help me mentally move forwards. Once all this has happened I will then allow myself to start thinking about ttc again even though right now the thought terrifies me

  • Be kind to yourself, it’s an awful thing to go through and you need to heal physically and mentally which takes time. I don’t know how long as I’m still working through it.

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Dear Blue00,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss. Thank you so much for taking the time to write such a practical and informative post, it really will be so helpful to women going through surgery for ectopic pregnancy.

It is good to hear that you are setting small goals, but do be kind to yourself. Do not be alarmed if you are more tired or emotional some days. This is perfectly normal and recovery usually takes around six weeks after surgery.

The chances of a further ectopic after a first in UK is 10%. So that’s 90% chance of the embryo being in right place next time.

While generally it is possible to conceive after an ectopic pregnancy, the amount of time it takes varies from couple to couple. Factors include age, general health, reproductive health and how often you have sex, among other things. It may be comforting to know that 65% of women are successfully pregnant within 18 months of experiencing an ectopic pregnancy and some studies suggest this rises to around 85% after two years.

As a gentle reminder regarding conceiving again, we and many medical professionals advise waiting for two menstrual cycles. It is important to allow time for your body to recover and emotions to surface and be worked through. This is so that you have some comfort that your body is returning to its natural rhythm and you have a last menstrual period date from which to date a new pregnancy - key information in checking you are not suffering from an ectopic pregnancy in the future. The first bleed soon after surgery for ectopic pregnancy is not classed as a period as it is the body’s response to falling hormone levels.

Importantly early scans avail. As soon as you know you are pregnant, contact your local EPU to inform them and book in for an early scan at around six weeks. Remind them of your previous ectopic pregnancy. This self refer route is the best route in our view. Hopefully you will have some comfort to know you are under the radar of medical professionals right away.

Making the decision to begin trying to conceive is an emotional rollercoaster compounded by our sad loss. Again, you are not alone. We here emotional support whenever you need us. There is a specific Preparing for Your Next Pregnancy board you can look at too whenever feel ready.

Sending much love,

Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

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Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk

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