I had an ectopic pregnancy and it had ruptured my tube, I was internal bleeding they had to remove my tube and my ovary this happened a week before Christmas. I am just really struggling emotionally to deal with all this. The hospital staff were vile aftsr my op i wanted a toliet they wouldn’t help me- so i fell, wouldnt poor me water as they were ‘too busy’. I had no aftercare advice. I am thankfuk to this site. I have no friends were I live so I had to go through it all alone. It was so rushed and sudden. It’s just been traumatic. I am just feeling really down and not myself still. Is this normal? How did everyone else cope/deal with it?
One day I feel ok the next it’s like I can’t breathe and coherently lead a normal day. I go back to university tomorrow and I just feel so alone. No one I know has been through this. I have never felt so lonely
I’m so sorry for your loss. I too had an ectopic and my right tube removed 2weeks before Christmas. It is an awful thing to have to happen and emotionally I too am struggling. Not a day has gone by that my thoughts havnt been consumed by what has happened to us. Everything you are feeling is normal. I’m hoping in the coming months our pain and hurt will ease a little. I’m so glad I found this forum as I now realise I’m not alone in how I am feeling x
I had my right tube removed the on the 27/12/17. While I’m at home I feel ok most of the time I guess I feel safe in my home. Yesterday we went out for lunch it was nice but then felt awful because i felt ok. All I wanted was for life to carry on but now it’s started too I feel guilty for not feeling sad all the time. I guess what I’m saying is we will all deal with this horrible situation differently, there’s no right or wrong just different. Take the time you need, cry the tears you need to cry. We will live through this, we will be different people because of it but we will be happy again xxx
You mention that you have returned to university. Please be gentle and allow time to grieve, to heal both physically and emotionally.
In general, after six weeks you should be able to return to most jobs from a physical point of view, but many women need to take more time off to help them deal with the psychological (emotional) impact of the loss of their baby and the frightening experience they felt being diagnosed with and treated for an ectopic pregnancy.
Do not rush and if you feel that you need further time off, please contact your doctor’s surgery.
Sending much love,
Karen x
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This time is hard for us all. But I have never felt so alone And all aspects of my life feel strained. I too had the experience of guilt yesterday with university. I had to go back due to being very behind now. If I miss anymore I will have to quit and it took a lot for me to decide to do a ma programme. I find people just assume I am ok because I look it and act like I am. But I am really not and I’ve never had to deal with anything like this before. It’s been the worse experience of my life. I also had sex for the first time last night and I found my right side was really hurting after- is that normal? Have you experienced that. The aftermath of sex was emotionally tough too.
I had no pain after having sex for the first time after surgery but I cried (weird I know) I don’t know why I cried but big hot tears spilled down my cheeks! Maybe it was a combination of guilthe that I shouldn’t even be thinking about having sex so soon after our ordeal (it was 3weeks after surgery) or that here we were back to ttc again and not knowing how long it would take to conceive again especially now with part of my reproductive system missing! Our bodies and emotions are totally messed up after what we have been through right? Maybe say it to your doctor about the pain, I’m not sure if it’s normal or not as I havnt experienced it. X
