How have others been coping with having friends/family who are pregnant or who have had kids recently?
My younger sister and I got pregnant at the exact same time, except that mind ended up being ectopic and hers was healthy. She is due in about a month and it’s been hard seeing her pregnancy progress.
I also have friends who are having babies, and I’m being invited to baby showers. I don’t think I can bring myself to go, which I feel bad about, but I’m sure they would understand. It’s just all really crappy feeling.
Dear Catlady,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,
We hear from many women who struggle with news about pregnancy from their friends and families. This is very normal and I was the same after my loss. When I had my ectopic pregnancy I had to attend a family function and a close family member was heavily pregnant. I spent the whole day and evening avoiding her as I found it too hard to be near her. It’s what I needed to do to get through the day and have some space and please protect your heart in whatever way you need. This does not make us “bad” people and it is possible to be happy for those around us while grieving for our own loss. Pregnancies and babies can be a very stark reminder of what could have been and it can be painful. Please do be gentle with yourself and you can talk to us whenever you need.
Sending much love and warm hugs,
Karen x
The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
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Yeah, it’s tough. I met up with a couple of friends the week before last and they both had small babies. I had found out I was pregnant for the second time the day before and had similar symptoms to my first ectopic (turned out to be a very early miscarriage this time). Seeing them with their babies made me feel sad and a bit jealous and hopeless but I’m just trying to accept that that’s how I felt in the moment and it will pass.
I think anyone who cares about you will completely understand and you should take the space you need if it helps you to heal.
Take care x