Hello. Not after any advice or solutions here, just wanted a safe place to share my sadness tonight. I’m 6 weeks post surgery for ruptured ectopic, after trying for 6 months to conceive with my wonderful husband. We also have a four year old daughter. I really am so lucky with the life we have. I’ve been recovering well, and had bought ovulation and pregnancy test kits ready to try again. However tonight my husband broke the news to me that he doesn’t want another baby now. I knew he was less keen than I was, but still just feeling so desperately sad that I lost my baby, which now looks like the last opportunity I will get. My heart is broken tonight and is going to take some time to heal.
Life is good, but there is a hole and emptiness there in place of the dreams I had.
Hi Hannah82
I’m so sorry you’re going through this - I’m 6 weeks as well so know what you’re going through.
You must be devastated to have received this news, especially at a time when your emotions are so raw.
I don’t know if it helps but we’re all here if you want support or just need to talk. Just be kind to yourself and give yourself time to heal. Sending you lots of love xxxx
Thanks for your kind words. I hope you are recovering yourself. X x x
Hi, so sorry for your loss. 
I think this is a natural reaction. (I was treated with methotrexate on April 7th, finished treatment on May 18th). My husband has said from the day I met him he wants kids, he’d have them tomorrow, in a heartbeat, etc. Now, after the ectopic, he’s adamant if it poses any threat or risk to me, he’s not interested, at all.
This is a natural thing for our partners to feel… Whilst it’s awful to endure what we have endured, it must be equally awful in a different way for our partners. They have to watch the person they love most suffer terrible emotional anguish, immeasurable physical pain, and be in life-threatening danger… and there’s nothing they can do about it. And they lose the baby they had just begun to look forward to meeting. Again, nothing they can do about that.
I would respect his opinion and not push it whilst you are dealing with the emotional fallout after this traumatic event, but open an honest dialogue with him when you feel ready. Already, my husband’s slightly relaxed to talk about it in an open and evaluative way. We haven’t reached a decision - it’s not something you can choose in a heartbeat after something like this, one way or another - but he’s no longer an adamant ‘no’.
It will take time… I really hope that you both reach an outcome you’re happy with xx
So, after my previous post, there was a rough patch emotionally, but my husband did come around to the idea of not actively trying for a baby, but not using protection.
I’m so thrilled now to be 13 weeks pregnant, with 2 scans showing everything normal so far. (He’s coming round to the idea that it has happened so quickly this time, as I don’t really think he expected me to fall pregnant).
I realise I’m extremely lucky to have got this far
After going through what we did earlier, I take nothing for granted.
My first pregnancy, I knew things could go wrong, but never really worried so much that it would happen to me. This time around I’ve been acutely aware of how it can turn into heartache. However, it can also go well! And that’s what I’m focusing on from now on.
Hope. 
Sending love to all the ladies out there in pain or struggling right now. X