5 day post surgery

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I found out I was pregnant 28th august, the next day I started bleeding I went to the hospital to get checked and got told I miscarried. A week later I had to do another test to check everything had passed and it was positive. I rang the hospital they was shocked I said it was still positive, I had to go for blood tests and scans. The scan didn’t show anything because I was too early. From there I had to have bloods every 2 days to check my hormone levels, my hormones were rising but not like they should be. After 2 weeks of going back and forth being told my pregnancy was fine and normal, I had miscarried again, it wasn’t going to be healthy, I had another scan which showed something in my right tube and fluid on my pelvis. The consultant then said to wait and see what happens I might pass it naturally. I had more bloods which showed my hormones had dropped and rised again. I had to go back to the hospital to be told I need to have the injection, I prepared myself for the injection signed the consent form, they then said I can go home until they had the injection to give me. I was only home half an hour when they rang to say I needed another scan the next morning before I was allowed it. When I went for the scan it showed it had grown and I had more fluid, they thought I was having a slow rupture. I then saw a different consultant who said if I had the injection it would be out of guidance and I had to stay in hospital so the consultant didn’t lose her job. Nurses also said they told the consultant they wasn’t comfortable giving me the injection. I made the decision to have the surgery. It got cancelled 3 times on the Monday so had to stay in hoping I’d get the surgery on the tuesday. The next morning a consultant came to see me saying he’d recommended the injection and not the surgery as they don’t expect to see anything. After a very heated conversation with the consultant trying to pressure me into deciding which to have. My results from another blood test came back which shown my hormones had again gone up. The decision was then made to have the surgery. Finally Tuesday afternoon I went to surgery, it went well and they removed my right tube due to it being damaged. They said from they seen it was an ectopic pregnancy. When in recovery the consultant informed me it went well but the injection would have worked.

I’m now 4 day post surgery and feel like I’ve still not processed what has happened. I’m scared of what will happen in future pregnancy and not being able to have a baby. In total I saw 8 different consultants that all told me different things and I feel angry I wasn’t took as seriously as I should have been.

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Dear Megan,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy loss and everything you have been through. From your own words I can only imagine how frightening this must have been and my heart truly goes out to you.

These boards are a safe space for you to write down how you are feeling, you are among friends here who understand and you can lean on us for as long as you need.

If you feel you would like to speak to somebody about your treatment in the hospital or find out more about the decision making that went on, please contact the Patient Advice Liaison Service (PALS) department in your hospital who will be able to look into this for you.

Experiencing an ectopic pregnancy is a huge ordeal and you are in the early stages of recovery. Your body needs time to heal from your surgery which is in itself a gruelling task. You have also had to process the loss of your baby and been through an immense rollercoaster of emotions - all of this will take time to come to terms with.

You should take it very easily for about six weeks after surgery. Your body will be using its energies to heal internally. It is normal to feel physically and emotionally exhausted during this time and please do be kind to yourself. Recovery can take time and some days will be better than others, one day you maybe ok and the next you maybe in discomfort or more emotional. This is perfectly usual and the healing process will go back and forth in this way for however long you need. It is important to listen to your body’s signals and pain and feeling tired are your body’s signs to tell you to rest. We suggest keeping a healthy balanced diet, drinking lots of water and resting. Once your wounds have healed, very gentle exercise such as a short walk can help, but please do take this slowly.

It is normal to feel anxious about the future. We experience a mix of emotions from wanting to try again to being petrified of what may lie ahead. We never forget our experience or babies, but we can learn to accept what happened. It is a slow process that might be weeks or months ahead. In time, we can get to a place where we feel comfortable trying again. When this is, is individual for each person. There is no timeframe for recovery, take each day as it comes. Importantly, you can book.in for an early pregnancy scan. As soon as you know you are pregnant, contact your local EPU to inform them and book in for an early scan at around six weeks. Remind them of your previous ectopic pregnancy. This self refer route is the best route in our view. Hopefully you will have some comfort to know you are under the radar of medical professionals right away.

The chances of a further ectopic after a first in UK is 10%. So that’s 90% chance of the embryo being in right place next time. While generally it is possible to conceive after an ectopic pregnancy, the amount of time it takes varies from couple to couple. Factors include age, general health, reproductive health and how often you have sex, among other things. It may be comforting to know that 65% of women are successfully pregnant within 18 months of experiencing an ectopic pregnancy and some studies suggest this rises to around 85% after two years.

Making the decision to begin trying to conceive is an emotional rollercoaster compounded by our sad loss. Again, you are not alone. We here emotional support whenever you need us. There is a specific Preparing for your Next Pregnancy board you can look at too whenever feel ready.

For now, he kind to yourself and allow time to grieve and heal both physically and emotionally.

Sending much love,

Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

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