My partner and I have been ttc for over 3 years. I had surgery in January to open one of my tubes as both were blocked due to pelvic inflammatory disease. I fell pregnant in August this year unknowingly and kept going to hospital 3 times complaining of black bleeding and shooting pains only to be turned away each time until I had horrific pains and was vomiting in A+E. 7 hours later they told me I was pregnant in my fallopian tube and scan showed I was bleeding internally and had emergancy surgery and blood transfusion. Fast forward to a fortnight ago I was having stitch type pain, took a test that turned out to be pregnant again 3 months after ectopic. I had no bleeding but slight pain on left side. Had scan yesterday at 6 weeks which showed it was ectopic again so had surgery that eve and tube also removed and was told it was on the verge of rupturing and I’d already started to bleed internally again. In a lot of pain and now have no tubes. I’ve had 3 laparoscopic surgeries this year and 2 ectopics/tube removal in the space of 3 months which is a lot to deal with. Hoping I’ll be allowed IVF on NHS but was told after first ectopic they may not allow funding as I’d conceived even though it was ectopic. Hope one day I’ll be able to have a child I can carry to term and not result in physical and emotional pain with no end result each time as every time it happens takes a piece of you with it. I’m sure many of you also feel that.
Dear Hopeful100,
It breaks my heart to hear of all you have been through this year, and I am so sorry that you have had to experience any of it. In 2010, I had two ectopics in a row. Two surgeries. It is both a physical and emotional toll, and it takes time to recover. In my experience, I wish I had given myself a bit more space, a bit more time. Certainly, after the second, I felt that I was more kind to myself. Life did not just snap back into place.
I wish I could give you a road map of recovery or certainty of what comes next. It’s so very different for each of us, but so important to really, really put yourself first and focus on being kind to yourself. There is no expectation for you to know the next step or to take any steps until you are ready, physically and emotionally. You will be able to speak to your partner and GP about options to explore.
Just know that we are here for you though all of this, and we are bound, unfortunately, by this experience. These boards are a safe space for you.
Sending hugs,
Michele
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