Dear Kelly,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss.
My situation was a little different as I was treated with methotraxate. I only took a week off work then worked part time hours the following week before returning full time. In hindsight this was not enough time physically, let alone coping emotionally and I wish I had taken more time off to allow time to grieve.
Surgery is an immense ordeal for the body to go through. In general, after about six weeks, you should be able to return to most jobs from a physical point of view. However, if your role involves manual handling, we suggest that it would be sensible to have a phased approach, gently building up to the usual extent of activity. I would suggest avoiding a rapid return to strenuous activities as it is important to build up strength after recovery.
A few options may be available depending on the role: might there be an opportunity to work reduced hours, increasing them slowly over a few weeks? Perhaps there are certain tasks that you could take on which may entail a change from your usual role or a series of reduced tasks initially? I am not sure whether this is appropriate in your circumstances, but is there anything that you could action from home (which may be different from your usual role but still be of use)?
Many women experience pain after surgery and this can be the case weeks or months after the trauma. Pain is the body’s sign to rest and it is important to be guided by this and taking it easier if they experience discomfort.
In addition, it is worth bearing in mind that experiencing ectopic pregnancy is a very frightening experience and many women need to take time to help them deal with the psychological/emotional impact of the loss of their baby, being diagnosed with a life-threatening condition and undergoing major surgery.
We are all different and cope in varying ways. Keep an open dialogue with your employer and listen to your body.
Sending much love,
Karen x
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