Recovery after EP

Main Board
1

Hello!

I wanted to know how long did it take to recover after EP both physically and emotionally?

I found out I was pregnant Friday the 23rd so I took Hubby out that evening to surprise him and made a video of his reaction. I had a miscarriage last year July 2017 so this was special. I was between 7-8 weeks. I woke up alright at 5 Saturday morning. I went back to bed after using emptying my bladder. 10 minutes after that I felt so much pain I was screaming, sweating and nauseated. My husband didn’t know what to do. And then I started vomiting and having loose stools. I’m in denial of ectopic pregnancy at the back of my mind. After an hour, the pain settled but I was feeling very dizzy. I sent my husband to work as my pain threshold is very high and I’m quite very independent. I was left alone. I’m a nurse, you see and I’m not used to being looked after. The pain continued and I could feel my consciousness slipping like I want to pass out. After 8 hours, at 12:30 I went out of the house and called a minicab to take me to the nearest A and E. I was assessed there and the doctor told me I was suffering from gastroenteritis because of the vomiting and loose stools and he was going to discharge me. I was glad to hear that because I was afraid to hear it’s an EP. I asked for an ultrasound that time but the doctor said it’s illegal for them to do ultrasound in A and E and I said that’s impossible as we do that in A and E at my hospital. He said he’s convinced that it’s not EP. He tried to book an ultrasound but the earliest they can give me was Wednesday so I said I will go to my hospital to have an ultrasound done just to make sure. He was annoyed with me. He asked me to lie down so he can check my abdomen and when I did it was so painful I was crying! He panicked and went to call his consultant. When he came back he asked me to go the other room as his consultant agreed to do an ultrasound. And when the consultant came and done it, he said he can see free fluids around my liver, colon, around my right lower abdomen. And he said there shouldn’t be any fluids on those places then he said the words. It’s EP and my right fallopian tube has ruptured. I cried. I heard him say to the doctor to take me straight to Resus. They pushed the bed and rushed me there and I was surrounded by so many people suddenly. The gynae team came, nurses, anaesthetist, etc. The pain of hearing that I was going to lose another baby was unbearable. The gynae doctor performed another ultrasound and found the baby’s heartbeat but we can’t do anything to save my baby. They were still struggling to insert a cannula as all my veins collapsed. They had to do a femoral stab to get blood samples. The doctor said I am lucky to be alive after that long and I am internally bleeding, that’s the fluids they’ve seen earlier on. As they were wheeling me to Theatre, I held one of the doctors hand and asked if we can do something to save my baby and she said no. I felt my heart break and my tears just flowed down. I thought of dying at that moment. I was instructed to breathe onto an oxygen and take deep breaths and I was out. I woke up in recovery and then transferred to the ward. I cried silently. The nurse kept coming to see me as my blood pressure was low. That morning after the surgery, the gynae consultant came and explained to me that they removed the baby, removed my right fallopian tube, suctioned a liter of blood because of the rupture I had internal bleeding, my left tube is stuck to my left ovary and it is pathologically defective, I am high risk of another EP and I am not able to get pregnant naturally. All of these at one go. How much can someone take? And 3 weeks before I had my EP my mum had ruptured aneurysm and was fighting for her life.

After all these, how long can someone recover? I’m just crying and don’t know what to do. I am thinking of resigning from work as I don’t want to be a burden to my colleagues.

Please advise

Thank you

2

Dear Bitamina,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and losses.

When we experience ectopic pregnancy we are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it’s treatment, reduction in fertility, concerns about the future and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal, putting them together is immense and your feelings are completely normal.

You should take it very easily for about six weeks after surgery. Your body will be using its energies to heal internally. It is normal to feel physically and emotionally exhausted during this time and please do be kind to yourself. Recovery can take time and some days will be better than others, one day you maybe ok and the next you maybe in discomfort or more emotional. This is perfectly usual and the healing process will go back and forth in this way for however long you need. It is important to listen to your body’s signals and pain and feeling tired are your body’s signs to tell you to rest. We suggest keeping a healthy balanced diet, drinking lots of water and resting. Once your wounds have healed, very gentle exercise such as a short walk can help, but please do take this slowly.

With regards to returning to work, in general after six weeks you should be able to return to most jobs from a physical point of view, but many women need to take more time off to help them deal with the psychological (emotional) impact of the loss of their baby and the frightening experience they felt being diagnosed with and treated for an ectopic pregnancy. You have been through a huge ordeal in such a short space of time, I would advise talking to your GP about taking further time off work to give yourself time, rather than look at resigning.

Many women experience feelings of isolation after an ectopic pregnancy - I did, too. It is a frightening experience. Like you, I reached out to the Trust for support and I will be here for you to lean on for as long as you need.

We at the Trust believe that talking through what happened and your emotions as and when you can helps the healing process. We operate a helpline service and there’s no pressure whatsoever but if you would ever like the opportunity to speak over the phone to someone who has been through a similar experience, do feel free to call, details are below. We can take things at your pace entirely and you are free to ask any questions that are on your mind. You can talk about the ordeal you have been through and express your feelings to vent and let off some steam. We can exchange emails too, if you prefer that route. We’ll simply be here for you, however you wish and for as long as you wish.

There is no time frame for how long it takes us to heal emotionally and it is completely normal to feel anxious about the future. We will never forget our pregnancy or babies but we can learn to accept what has happened and crucially understand that it wasn’t our fault.

Sending much love and warm hugs,

Karen X

If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering?

Further information is available at www.ectopic.org.uk

Email us at ept@ectopic.org.uk.

Our helpline is 020 7733 2653 (available Monday to Friday 10am - 4pm).

Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team.