I’m overweight AND an older mother. I feel like people judge me all the time, that I’m wrong to want a baby, that I caused my miscarriage and ectopic pregnancy because I’m fat & old. Isn’t it had enough that I’m going through the pain of losing 3 babies in 5 months without being made to feel like it’s my fault, that I didn’t deserve to have a healthy baby.
Hi Princessjo25,
My heart goes out to you. You’ve been through so much in a short period of time. Each baby loss we experience is a traumatic event - physically and emotionally.
We at the Trust believe that talking through what happened and your emotions as and when you can help the healing process. We operate a helpline service and there’s no pressure whatsoever but if you would ever like the opportunity to speak over the phone to someone who has been through a similar experience, do feel free to call, details are below. We can take things at your pace entirely and you are free to ask any questions that are on your mind. You can talk about the ordeal you have been through and express your feelings to vent and let off some steam. We can exchange emails too if you prefer that route. We’ll simply be here for you, however, you wish and for as long as you wish.
In addition, you can ask to see a GP at your practice and ask them to explore ways in which you can get help and this can include referrals for “talking therapies” or counselling. The charity, Mind, may also be of assistance. They have local centres and support groups and can offer services on a means-tested basis or sometimes free. You can find your local centre following this link if that may be useful too: http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/local-minds/
From the bottom of my heart, there is nothing you could have done to prevent the ectopic pregnancy from happening. I cannot emphasise enough - you are not to blame. Please be kind to yourself and I send you gentle hugs.
With warm wishes,
Michele
If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering?
Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk
Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk
We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653
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Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team