How long does it take to heal?

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1

Hi all,

Firstly thank you so much to this group, it’s so lovely to have women to talk to who understand. It certainly feels so very lonely on a day to day basis as I don’t feel anyone quite gets it.

After suffering an eating disorder for many years, my periods never returned despite recovering the weight. For 18 months we’ve been doing fertility treatment and last July unfortunately miscarried. Almost 7 weeks ago I had a ruptured ectopic (it was very traumatic as I was not scanned or taken seriously when I told them I was in pain) and had a litre of internal bleeding so was rushed for emergency surgery and totally alone because of Covid. 4 weeks after surgery I had pain behind my belly button where they cut into me. Turns out it was infected and I was given antibiotics.

My query is, 7 weeks on, I still don’t really feel 100%. Some days are better than others, but physically what’s the average time for recovery? I have become so incredibly anxious about every pain or cramp I feel and at times the overthinking is crippling. I guess with covid and from being ignored with the ectopic, it’s made me question everything. I worry this happened for a reason and often wonder why me.

I know emotionally it’ll take me a while, but thought physically I would be much stronger by now. I’ve read others recover and try again very quickly but I feel totally afraid and far from ready despite desperately wanting a baby.

Any advice or personal experiences would be greatly appreciated. Sending you all love and strength and hoping only positive times to come for us all!

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Dear Gigi20,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,

You have been through a huge amount in such a short space of time and it is very normal to feel overwhelmed. From your words, I can imagine how frightening the experience must have been and I am sorry you have had to go though this.

Experiencing an ectopic pregnancy is a huge ordeal and you are in the early stages of recovery. Your body needs time to heal from your surgery which is in itself a gruelling task. You have also had to process the loss of your baby and been through an immense rollercoaster of emotions - all of this will take time to come to terms with.

We generally advise to take it easy for 6 weeks after surgery but this is an average and some women will need longer to recover. Bare in mind that you have also sadly suffered a post operative infection so you are going to take longer to heal.

Experiencing some pain after an ectopic pregnancy is normal as your body has been through a great deal. Some women experience pain for a few months after ectopic pregnancy, I did too.

The pain may be due to adhesions (scar tissue that binds two parts of the body together) which form and take some time to settle. Your body may be preparing to ovulate and many women experience ovulation pain when they did not before their ectopic pregnancy - including myself. You also may have a heightened perception because of the sad loss that you have had to go through. If you find you experience offensive smelling discharge or an increased temperature of more than 37°C or just want to be checked out to be on the safe side, it would be worth asking your doctors to run tests to check for infection.

If the pain persists, I suggest keeping a pain diary noting when the pain appears, the intensity on a scale of 0-10 and anything that helps the pain eg resting, hot water bottle, paracetamol etc. Visiting your doctors with this information helps them to assess how best to manage your symptoms.

I am not sure if you work but if you do not feel ready to return, please speak to your GP about having further time off work if required. It is worth bearing in mind that experiencing ectopic pregnancy is a very frightening experience and many women need to take time to help them deal with the psychological/emotional impact of the loss of their baby, being diagnosed with a life-threatening condition and undergoing major surgery.

It is normal to feel anxious about the future. We experience a mix of emotions from wanting to try again to being petrified of what may lie ahead. We never forget but we can learn to accept what happened. It is a slow process that might be weeks or months ahead. In time, we can get to a place where we feel comfortable trying again. When this is, is individual for each person. There is no timeframe for recovery, take each day as it comes.

Importantly early scans avail. As soon as you know you are pregnant, contact your local EPU to inform them and book in for an early scan at around six weeks. Remind them of your previous ectopic pregnancy. This self refer route is the best route in our view. Hopefully you will have some comfort to know you are under the radar of medical professionals right away.

As a gentle reminder regarding conceiving again, we and many medical professionals advise waiting for two menstrual cycles. It is important to allow time for your body to recover and emotions to surface and be worked through. This is so that you have some comfort that your body is returning to its natural rhythm and you have a last menstrual period date from which to date a new pregnancy - key information in checking you are not suffering from an ectopic pregnancy in the future. The first bleed soon after surgery for ectopic pregnancy is not classed as a period as it is the body’s response to falling hormone levels.

These boards are a safe space to share, ask questions, or to vent. They are filled with people who have been through similar experiences and journeys, and we are here for you for as long as you need.

Sending much love,

Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards

During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.

If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?

Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk

Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk

We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653

Take a look at our newsletters and subscribe to our mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/986bdd6091ee/ectopic-matters

Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team

3

Hi Karen

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply. I do feel reassured to know 6 weeks isn’t a huge amount of time and so I need to be patient and kind to myself to fully heal. I am definitely hyper aware of all pains and feelings inside though and feel extremely anxious, partly because there was no follow up or check to see how I am healing inside. I guess only time can tell this.

The issue with the belly button is that it gets wet in the bath/shower so I hope this doesn’t cause an infection to return.

With regards to trying again, I don’t have periods so find it hard to know ‘2 cycles worth’ but will have to go based on how I feel physically and emotionally - this changes daily! X

4

Dear Gigi20,

Wound sites can be concerning, I would advise gently drying your belly button and as silly as it sounds you can also use a hairdryer on a low setting to ensure it is dry.

If you do not have periods, I would advise waiting until you are comfortable, but waiting for around 12 weeks which would be roughly 2 periods for an an average lady as the first bleed after ectopic pregnancy is not classed as a period. This wait will also give your body time to heal.

There really is no timeframe for recovery, please do take your time and continue to lean on us for as long as you need.

Sending much love,

Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards

During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.

If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?

Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk

Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk

We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653

Take a look at our newsletters and subscribe to our mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/986bdd6091ee/ectopic-matters

Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team