Half way through Expectant Treatment - nervous of future

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Hi everyone

I’m so thankful to have found this site whilst lying in a hostel round the corner from the hospital A & E last week, having no idea how to process what was happening. My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for 4 months, and the joy at my BFP quickly became confusion, sadness and then panic as a miscarriage, then finally an Ectopic, was diagnosed.

I am being treated expectantly: my pregnancy is in the fallopian tubes and was 1cm big, but now is reducing in size of its own accord - going from HCG 313 - 302 - 588 - to a big drop of 175 at last reading. Starting to feel slightly more alive and back at work but still very anxious and desperate to be over.

This week is the first time the fears about future fertility have really hit me. We are so keen to have a baby, but this has just been the most terrifying, lonely experience. I keep looking at statistics for second ectopics as feel so sure it will happen again. Are there any statistics on whether expectant treatment offers an ok outlook? I’m not sure whether it would have been better for the tube to have been taken out, if it’s potentially damaged?

Would love some hope that this is unlikely to happen again, and that we will be able to have a baby. Appreciate there are no guarantees though.

Finally - just wanted to say I think all of you women going through/ having gone through this are amazing - it’s been such a comfort reading your stories. The fact we are all getting through this and even contemplating trying again is testament to how brave we all are.

Sophie

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From the trust booklets there is not much difference in expectant management vs other protocols. 65% of women are healthily pregnant within 18mths and I think that figure is closer to 85% at 2yrs. Also those stats include people like me who are not trying to get pregnant and therefore pulling down the figures. Chance of overall reoccurrence in a lifetime is 1/10 which is 9/10 that it never happens again.

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Dear Sophie123,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,

When we experience ectopic pregnancy we are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it’s treatment reduction in fertility concerns about the future and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal putting them together is immense and your feelings are completely normal.

As EctopicPUL has kindly replied, there is no difference between treatment routes in future chances of experiencing an ectopic pregnancy.

Importantly early scans avail. As soon as you know you are pregnant, contact your local EPU to inform them and book in for an early scan at around six weeks. Remind them of your previous ectopic pregnancy. This self refer route is the best route in our view. Hopefully you will have some comfort to know you are under the radar of medical professionals right away next time.

As a gentle reminder regarding conceiving again, we and many medical professionals advise waiting for two menstrual cycles. It is important to allow time for your body to recover and emotions to surface and be worked through. This is so that you have some comfort that your body is returning to its natural rhythm and you have a last menstrual period date from which to date a new pregnancy - key information in checking you are not suffering from an ectopic pregnancy in the future. The first bleed soon after surgery for ectopic pregnancy is not classed as a period as it is the body’s response to falling hormone levels.

Making the decision to begin trying to conceive is an emotional rollercoaster compounded by our sad loss. Again, you are not alone. We here emotional support whenever you need us. There is a specific Preparing for Your Next pregnancy board you can look at too whenever feel ready.

Sending much love and warm hugs,

Karen x

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