I was diagnosed with an ectopic pregnancy on June 27/18. I was approximately 7 weeks 3 days and had my first dose of methotrexate; I was about 3200 hcg. I had a second dose the week after due to my levels not going down enough.
The first dose, I experienced no symptoms. After the second dose, I was getting extremely bad pain and pressure in my bowel/bladder. I did have this same excruciating sharp pains about a week and a half before finding out it was ectopic. It’s definitely the worst spasm/cramp/ache/shooting pain I’ve ever experienced. I went to the hospital twice due to the pain; the first trip, they said it could be “labour like” pains. I returned 3 days later with more severe pain and had a pelvic exam that was sooo painful. I could barely walk without crying in pain. I found out that the pain wasn’t actually coming from the rectal area but rather was referred pain and I was probably inflamed. I was also told the mass was still in my left tube and I was basically “getting kicked in the ovaries”. I was prescribed pain meds that did absolutely nothing. I returned to see my doctor and was prescribed t3s.
4 weeks later, and I’m now at 61 hcg. My only big frustration is that I’m still experiencing pain. I get jabs of pain on my left side (not unbearable but it’s there and annoying) and still have pressure in my bowels/bladder area. It still feels uncomfortable to use the washroom and even sometimes when I sit down. I’m curious to know if anyone else has experienced this and how long this could last?
Not only is the emotional piece terrible to go through but the physical aspect is so long and draining! I hate this. It’s frustrating that even over 4 weeks later, I can’t fully move on.
I also have so much fear that this will happen again. I don’t know why this had to happen (I know it can be simply bad luck) but it doesn’t make it any easier to digest. I don’t even know how to handle being around other pregnant women. I have some friends who are pregnant that I don’t feel ready being around as I just don’t want to hear about their pregnancy. I feel guilty as it’s not their fault and they don’t have control over their situation compared to mine. But, deep down I still feel bitter. I know this will eventually pass as time moves forward but they’re friends and I feel bad about it.
I really, really hope that the next pregnancy will be the one. I don’t think I could go through this again.
Dear boisjess,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,
Abdominal pain following treatment with methotrexate injection is normal but whilst I do not wish to alarm you, abdominal pain can also be a sign of rupture. It is reassuring that your levels are quite low, but as I am not medically trained, I would always advise reporting changing or worsening signs to your EPU.
I am afraid it is difficult to predict how long it will take for your hormone levels reach non-pregnant levels. As we are all individual, our bodies respond differently to the drug and it depends on factors like how high levels reached and our unique physiology. What I can say is that it can take a number of weeks and, while it can take some time, it is not as invasive a procedure as surgery. It is also encouraging that your levels are falling steadily although I appreciate that it can be a drawn out process. Also, in terms of chances of future successful pregnancies, studies do not show a significant difference between treatment routes, whether surgical, medical using methotrexate or expectant management (allowing time for the body to resolve the pregnancy itself).
We hear from many women who struggle with news about pregnancy from their friends and families. This is very normal and I was the same after my loss. When I had my ectopic pregnancy I had to attend a family function and a close family member was heavily pregnant. I spent the whole day and evening avoiding her as I found it too hard to be near her. It’s what I needed to do to get through the day and have some space and please protect your heart in whatever way you need. This does not make us “bad” people and it is possible to be happy for those around us while grieving for our own loss. Pregnancies and babies can be a very stark reminder of what could have been and it can be painful. Please do be gentle with yourself and you can talk to us whenever you need.
Please take the time you need to recover both physically and emotionally,
Sending much love,
Karen x
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