Ectopic Pregnancy with Methotrexate when are things better.

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I’m not sure if this will help but I need to do somthing. It’s been 6 weeks since I had the scan that told me my baby was ectopic. We’ve tried for 1 and a half years. Our first pregnancy is ectopic and it feels like the ground has been taken from under me. I caught it early because I started spotting and it didn’t stop. Those first weeks are focused in and out of hospital blood tests waiting results pain meetings waiting blood test pain results meetings injections more pain blood tests. It takes over and becomes this strange routine. But once the levels are down safe what is it then. Guilt sadness lost loss guilt tired. The side affects sickness, nausea, loss of appetite etc.

Ive taken time off. I couldn’t stop crying at basically anything. To the point my eyes hurt I wanted it to stop to stop feeling like that all the time. So last week I shut down it seems because I don’t really remember feeling much just doing things keeping busy gardening, dog walking, baking, sowing, walking. It was my husband that brought me back, just hugged me spoke to me told me it was alright and the damn broke again.

I know it’s grief.

I’ve talked to councillors and should be kind to myself. At what point do things get better? Panic attacks when I talked yesterday we were talking about fears and I won’t say more. Is that normal? How do you know when your ready to move forward? And you don’t feel so angry at the idea of planning ahead. Because it feels wrong. Like forgetting. I don’t want to ever do that. But this isn’t healthy.

I have a rose for her. She’ll always grow in my garden.

No one has to answer this if you don’t want no one really has answers maybe this will help. I hope so.

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Dear Katherine,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss.

When a experience ectopic pregnancy as are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it’s treatment, reduction in future and and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal, putting them together is immense and your feelings are completely normal.

I was the same as you, the emotional impact didn’t hit me until I was discharged from hospital care and I found it very hard to come to terms with. There literally is no timeframe for recovery and we will all approach things at our own speed, take each day as it comes. Trauma counsellors suggest that a three month period is about average to start to come to terms with a huge life event, some will take longer, so be kind to yourself. From the other side, I can say that I will never forget my experience or my baby but as I learnt that it wasn’t my fault and there was nothing I could have done to.prevent the ectopic pregnancy, it has got easier.

These boards are a safe place to share your thoughts and feelings.or if you just want to vent, we will be here for you for as long as you need. Some colleagues also recommend journaling about your experience helps to make sense of emotions.

Whilst your feelings are completely normal at this stage of recovery, if the bad days start to outweigh the good, we at the Trust believe that talking through what happened and your emotions as and when you can helps the healing process. We operate a helpline service and there’s no pressure whatsoever but if you would ever like the opportunity to speak over the phone to someone who has been through a similar experience, do feel free to call, details are below. We can take things at your pace entirely and you are free to ask any questions that are on your mind. You can talk about the ordeal you have been through and express your feelings to vent and let off some steam. We can exchange emails too, if you prefer that route. We’ll simply be here for you, however you wish and for as long as you wish.

In addition, you can ask to see a GP at your practice and ask them to explore ways in which you can get help and this can include referrals for “talking therapies” or counselling. We have information on our website about finding counselling services.

The charity Mind may also be of assistance. They have local centres and support groups and can offer services on a means-tested basis or sometimes free. You can find your local centre following this link if that may be useful too: http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/local-minds/

Many women also experience feelings of isolation after an ectopic pregnancy - I did, too. It is a frightening experience. Like you, I reached out to the Trust for support and we will be here for you to lean on for as long as you need.

Sending much love and warm hugs,

Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards

During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.

If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?

Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk

Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk

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Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team