Did anyone look at the remains?

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1

The remains are ready for collection - I feel I need to look to understand what I have lost, to make sense of how developed it was and whether it had a heartbeat or not etc.

Has anyone looked? I’ve been told it’s tissue so assuming it’s not foetus like but I’m not sure. Did anyone look and regret the decision?

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Dear LTQKVS,

I am sorry I cannot provide a personalised answer for this as I was treated with methotrexate.

Although I do not wish to upset you, I am guessing if you have been told its tissue, It is not going to look like a foetus and it is extremely unlikely that you would be able to see a heart.

Would looking give you closure of make you more upset if it doesn’t look as you imagine and that becomes your lasting memory. I know that I did not have the choice but I do not wish I had the choice. I still remember my baby as exactly that.

I think you should think deeply about how it will affect you and make a decision best for you,

Sending much love,

Karen x

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Thanks Karen. I didn’t expect this option and with it been so rushed I picked this option so I had time to think and then some nurses call it a baby and other nurses call it tissue and so it made me really stressed and confused to the point where I think I need to look to confirm what I have actually lost. I don’t know if it’s the right thing or going to make me feel more at peace I wish the hospital wouldn’t have treated it as a one size fits all with this sort of thing.