I wrote this before I was diagnosed with an ep.
Are you here?
Are you there?
Did you go?
Did you stay?
Where are you?
You’re nowhere.
Just empty space.
You’re somewhere
As my sad blood bets.
You’re nowhere.
Just a dead cell.
You’re somewhere
As traces are threats.
I said no
To my love for you.
I said yes
To let you go.
And then I thought you left me
Before I’d release and relieve you
Of this cold world.
But then it seems you didn’t go!
You were just hiding.
I asked a doctor for answers.
He doesn’t know much.
I asked a psychic for visions.
She doesn’t see much.
I prayed to God for closure.
But he doesn’t do much.
What can I do
But lay in my silence
And wait
In the wilderness
Of bewilderment.
A storm may come again
Or it subsided forever.
Let me try to sleep.
Wake me up when this is over.
