I found out about 10 days ago that I had an ectopic pregnancy in my left tube. Had no idea I was pregnant. I was treated with methotrexate and have been having regular blood tests, and they just told me to look out for any symptoms of rupturing in the mean time. So all has gone well so far and my levels have come down from 4950 to 3100 so far.
However I’ve found myself terrified of it rupturing. Every twinge or cramp or anything really I’m panicking is a red flag. I had to go to a and e two nights ago as I was so light headed and dizzy I fainted but they checked and all was ok and put it partly down to anxiety on my part. But I’m still terrfied I can’t take my mind off it. Here I am 1.30am unable to sleep because I’m so scared something could happen and it could rupture.
Did anyone else feel this way? Any advice on what I can do to ease my anxiety?
How youre feeling is exactly the same feelings i had after having methotrexate, I felt like a ticking timebomb waiting for my hormone levels to get down to 0. I think the not knowing what to expect and wondering if every twinge or pain was it rupturing and unfortunately mine did rupture and i ended up having emergency surgery and my right tube removed so although it is rare i would just say if you are experiencing a lot of pain then there is no harm in getting checked out. If you need to ask me anything please just shout
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss. I too, had methotrexate and know exactly how you feel. You are doing exactly the right thing in seeking advice with any worsening symptoms. You should also be being closely monitored and having blood tests every 3-7 days.
I am afraid it is difficult to predict how long it will take for your hormone levels reach non-pregnant levels. As we are all individual, our bodies respond differently to the drug and it depends on factors like how high levels reached and our unique physiology. What I can say is that it can take a number of weeks and, while it can take some time, it is not as invasive a procedure as surgery. It is also encouraging that your levels are falling steadily although I appreciate that it can be a drawn out process. Also, in terms of chances of future successful pregnancies, studies do not show a significant difference between treatment routes, whether surgical, medical using methotrexate or expectant management (allowing time for the body to resolve the pregnancy itself).
Be kind to yourself, and as a gentle reminder, please do not undertake any strenuous exercise or lifting or housework while your hCG levels are dropping.
Sending much love,
Karen x
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I know exactly how you feel. I felt exactly the same.
A few things that worked for me were taking time away from work, spending time with people who could make me laugh despite everything and mediating for HOURS. Listening to guided meditations kept my mind from wandering and relaxed me. I got a lot of rest and took it easy. I found the wait incredibly testing. One of the worst times of my life.
But now I am a few months out - I can say that every case is different.
I did end up having surgery after methotrexate as I thought I had ruptured - I had awful pain in my abdomin and tapping in both my shoulders when I would lay down. I knew instinctively that I needed help, no more panic, I went into focused mode. I went straight to A&E. They scanned me and took me into theatre. I had not ruptured but was internally bleeding so they operated and my tubes were both saved. The details of what happened to me though, I have found no one else has experienced so use this forum as a place for info and help not to read stories about things that could possibly happen and worry yourself, as that’s what I did and nothing that happened I could of predicted and nothing that happened was like the worries I had filled my head with. I was also terrified of having surgery but by the time it came, I had an amazing team around me. My nurse even held my hand all the way to theatre.
Secondly, you will get through this and every week will get better. After my surgery, I felt the most awful I have every felt in my entire life. I took a long time to recover. But now I’m a few months down the line, I feel like me again. I just spent the last few months focusing on healing and I get better everyday. This will pass and you will come out the other side. Time is constantly moving, you will get to the end of this.
I’m so sorry for what you are going through. Try to keep those negative thoughts out. If anything changes go get it checked out and stay focused on the future - when your levels are 0 and this has passed. Coming from someone who had days of thinking “I’ll never come back from this” but did x