Tomorrow would of been my 1st mothers day & i feel like i have such a big lump in my throat right now!!! It has been neally 20 months since it happened i was out shopping for my mom 2day & everwhere it was a stark reminder that i was NOT someones mommy & it hurts like hell!!! Life really has no meaning i put on a brave face lately now but I plod on with my day to day life… But life has no real meaning unless i have a baby of my very own.
If I never have my own baby I will have to carry on & concentrate on something else to fulfill my life but i pray to god that ONE day a mirical will happen :!:
To my little baby that i have lost i truely love you & think of you every day & you are forever in my thoughts sweetheat…as a rembrence to you I have planted some lovely plants in a pot outside so I can look at it and think of you as even though you never got to grow and be born I was going to be someones mom & i would like some acknowledgement of this even though other people ( family & friends) do not seem to care.
love u forever
mommy xxx
Hi Sarah Louise,
I just wanted to reply to let you know that yesterday was very hard for me too - and so I can totally relate to what you said. I have a sister with two kids and I helped them make mothers day cards for her - it was lovely to be around them, and to make the day special for her, but hard to feel ‘excluded’ from the ‘special club’. I found it especially hard when out at lunch with my family, the waitress brought over three little boxes of chocs, (meant for me, my mum and my sis) which said ‘happy mothers day’ on them, she obviously did not know if me or my sis were mums so it was good that she didnt ask or assume anything, but my step dad was moaning to my mum about not getting some (in a jokey way) and said ‘why cant i have any!’, she said ‘cause you are not a mum’, and then he said, pointing at me ‘well, neither is she!’ - it was like a massive kick in the gut, he totally didn’t meant to hurt me, but my god, it did. My mum called me later in the day to see how I was, as she totally picked up on it and had a massive go at him when they got home! It just hurt so much yesterday, I felt empty and meaningless, as though I wasn’t worthy - very negative I know, but that is how I felt. I just hope we do not have to go through another mothers day without a little one of our own. lots of love, thinking of you and sending you luck and hugs x jo
Thank you jo for your lovely reply. Im sorry you were feeling the same way to 
Life is so hard isn’t it? Take care & if you ever need to chat i am always here lurking in the background…
sarah louise xx
Hi Sarah Louise,
Yes life is very hard, but it is made much easier when you can share thoughts and feelings with people who really understand - thanks! speak soon x jo
Hi Jo & Sarah-louise
I really felt it on Mothers Day as well. My due date would have been yesterday which made Sunday really hard. I have 2 step-children and they were so sweet and made me cards and got me presents - but they have their own Mummy.
I posted on here a while ago because i was worrying about my edd and Izzie wrote me the most wonderful words - that we are all mothers its just that our little ones are not with us. It really helped me and you must both remember that you are mothers and hopefully very soon will have another little one to spend Mothers Day with.
Lots of love,
xxx
P.S. My 2 best friends and our dogs went to a beautiful place near where i live yesterday and i released a balloon with a letter attached to my little angel. xxx
Hi Tinkerbell i particularly liked ur special thing that you did in rememberance to your baby & thank you for your post. If you ever need a friend… well im always lurking in the background. Take care
sarah louise xx
Thank you Sarah-Louise that’s so kind - and i’m always around if you need to chat to someone.
Take lots of care of yourself x