Hi, few weeks back I thought it was a miscarriage but I was operated as an emergency yet again and lost my remaining tube on Sunday as it erupted.
Feeling very confused and wondering everything possible. Going to spend some time to get some peer support from this forum.
Joa
Dear Joa,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancies and losses. To experience one loss is difficult, to deal with multiple losses is heartbreaking and my heart truly goes out to you.
Please take all the time you need to grieve to heal both physically and emotionally, there is no timeframe for the grieving process and we will be here for you for as long as you need.
When you feel you are able, please speak to your GP about referral to specialist fertility services if you feel you want to.
Also, I hope you don’t mind me mentioning but there is a lady on the main board Chloe24xox, who has posted today about having both her tubes removed due to ectopic pregnancy and I just thought you may be of invaluable support to each other.
Please feel free to contact us whenever you need, we are all here for you.
Sending much love and warm hugs,
Karen x
If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering?
Further information is available at www.ectopic.org.uk
Email us at ept@ectopic.org.uk.
Our helpline is 020 7733 2653 (available Monday to Friday 10am - 4pm).
Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team.
I’m so sorry for what you are going through. I have just posted a very similar thread although I am being treated with methotrexate.
I am feeling very muddled and overwhelmed about everything and where to go from here.
I’m afraid I have no answers either but can give you support and a virtual hug.
Thank you all for the support, I don’t remember writing that last week that’s how shocked I was.
I started a second bleed on the Monday( I had had six week scan on the Tuesday before), called my ep-unit and got told it’s fine and just wait till Friday for blood tests as they were monitoring my hormone levels. I was at just over 100, got the results on Saturday and on Sunday my tube erupted at 2pm.
We are thinking was it a right call not to ask me in on the Monday as I had had previous ectopic, my bleeding was heavier than my normal period? Or is that normal?
Face to Face I got told ‘if you feel a twinge or bleed heavy, call us and come in’ then when I called they told me it’s nothing.
In my first ectopic the normal sonographer couldn’t see anything, six hours later the surgeon in charge wanted to re- scan and he found it straight away. It hadn’t erupted yet just seeping a little but couldn’t save and said other one looked in perfect condition. And that he was sure I would go on to have a normal pregnancy again I have no words on the way to the theatre the nurse said to me that I was lucky he was on shift as he can scan as others can’t and some people have been sent home and had an erupted tube due to sonographers not been able to find the ectopics. I felt lucky!
Second time around in the six week scan they couldn’t see anything in the remaining tube or elsewhere like the time before and they questioned my dates thinking I had come to the scan too early. I remembered what the nurse told me the first time about scanning and people’s abilities, I felt odd as I had same symptoms as time before… and I was hoping this time the sonographer was right and it had been a miscarriage.
If they would have scanned me on the Monday could they have saved my tube? Was that normal procedure and if so does it need looking?
Also I have a child 3.5yo who is freaking awesome and I know how lucky I am: but we wanted 4 kids and with us both working we had calculated we can only afford two kids ( second pregnancy could be twins though with some luck haha) and had already settled in our fate of not affording the large family we had dreamt of. But that control has now been taken away from us. I assume IVF is the only way forward and because we have a child we get no help on NHS.
I don’t want to sound like I should be entitled to, but I do pay my taxes and it’s not like I have 10 kids and want 11! And I also feel that some things could have been dealt with better especially in the events leading to the second operation. Feelings are changing how I feel about everything all the time.
Is there a way to ask for a review/complain/is there any point? I also love the NHS and wish them no extra work to have to deal with my issues but it obviously truly has changed the way we had hoped our lives to turn out.