Dear Jenni,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy loss.
When we experience ectopic pregnancy, we are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it’s treatments, reduction in fertility, concerns about the future and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal, putting them together is immense and your feelings are completely normal.
We hear from many women who struggle with news about pregnancy from their friends and families. This is very normal and I was the same after my loss. When I had my ectopic pregnancy I had to attend a family function and a close family member was heavily pregnant. I spent the whole day and evening avoiding her as I found it too hard to be near her. It’s what I needed to do to get through the day and have some space and please protect your heart in whatever way you need. This does not make us “bad” people and it is possible to be happy for those around us while grieving for our own loss. Pregnancies and babies can be a very stark reminder of what could have been and it can be painful. Please do be gentle with yourself and you can talk to us whenever you need.
Following methotrexate, you should wait until your hCG levels have fallen to below 5mIU/mL (your doctor will advise you when this is through blood or urinary tests) and then take a folic acid supplement for 12 weeks before you try to conceive.
This is because the drug may have reduced the level of folate in your body which is needed to ensure a baby develops healthily. The methotrexate is metabolised quickly but it can affect the quality of your cells, including those of your eggs, and the quality of your blood for up to three months after it has been given. The medicine can also affect the way your liver works and so you need to give your body time to recover properly before a new pregnancy is considered. A shortage of folate could result in a greater chance of a baby having a neural tube defect such as cleft lip and palate, or even spina bifida or other neural tube defects.
I hope this information helps. These boards are full of people who have experienced similar situations, they are a safe space to ask questions, gain support and even vent if needed and we will be here for you for as long as you need.
Sending much love,
Karen x
The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
Registered Charity Number: 1071811
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