Dear Gem-Lea,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss.
It is normal to feel anxious about the future. We experience a mix of emotions from wanting to try again to being petrified of what may lie ahead. We never forget but we can learn to accept what happened. It I a slow process - might be weeks or months ahead. In time, we can get to a place where we feel comfortable trying again. When this is, is individual for each person. There is no timeframe for recovery, take each day as it comes.
Importantly early scans avail. As soon as you know you are pregnant, contact your local EPU to inform them and book in for an early scan at around six weeks. Remind them of your previous ectopic pregnancy. This self refer route is the best route in our view. Hopefully you will have some comfort to know you are under the radar of medical professionals right away.
Doctors usually suggest a period of trying to conceive before suggesting any tests or investigations. The EPT advises that women under 35 should seek medical advice following 12 months trying to conceive (and those over 35 should seek advice after 6 months). This is because doctors would not want to introduce the risk of infection through invasive tests and also, as I mentioned above, the numbers are on our side when it comes to chances of successful pregnancies in the future.
It maybe of some comfort to know that the chances of a further ectopic after a first in UK is 10%. So that’s 90% chance of the embryo being in right place next time.
As a gentle reminder regarding conceiving again, we and many medical professionals advise waiting for two menstrual cycles. It is important to allow time for your body to recover and emotions to surface and be worked through. This is so that you have some comfort that your body is returning to its natural rhythm and you have a last menstrual period date from which to date a new pregnancy - key information in checking you are not suffering from an ectopic pregnancy in the future. The first bleed soon after surgery for ectopic pregnancy is not classed as a period as it is the body’s response to falling hormone levels.
Making the decision to begin trying to conceive is an emotional rollercoaster compounded by our sad loss. Again, you are not alone. We here emotional support whenever you need us. There is a specific TTC board you can look at too whenever feel ready.
Sending you much love,
Karen x
If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering?
Further information is available at www.ectopic.org.uk
Email us at ept@ectopic.org.uk.
Our helpline is 020 7733 2653 (available Monday to Friday 10am - 4pm).
Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team.
I had appendicitis almost 3 years ago and assumed this has caused damage to my right tube… I just have that strong feeling it will happen again