What a mess 😭

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1

Hello everyone,

Where do I start it’s all a mess… I found out I was pregnant last week massive shock as I was due to go in for surgery for suspected endometriosis within a few days however that got cancelled… I started to get pains went start to A&E who referred me to EPU saw them the following day they scanned me and told me it’s a suspected ectopic pregnancy in my right tube my heart sank had bloods done… went back up to A&E the following day in pain and was getting worse they basically sent me home… went back up there the following day because of bleeding more bloods done sent back home too busy to scan me… I went for my scan today and it’s definitely an ectopic in my right tube which thankfully has decreased in size and going naturally on it’s own… no surgery or injection which I am thankful for… I have got to go back for more bloods until pregnancy hormones are gone… so In the space of 5 days i was preparing for surgery then I found out I was pregnant and then found out that I lost it… my head feels like it’s in a blender I am emotionally and physically drained… so many questions and no one has the time to answer me… I am scared my fertility is shot and I might not be able to get pregnant again… does it mean my tubes are broken… I am not in any pain physically mentally is a different story and I am thankful I am alive… any advice would be amazing xx

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Dear Kmw-89,

I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss. You have been through a huge amount in such a short space of time and it is very normal to feel overwhelmed. From your words, I can imagine how frightening the experience must have been and I am sorry you have had to go though this.

When we experience ectopic pregnancy we are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it’s treatment, reduction in fertility, concerns about the future and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal, putting them together is immense and your feelings are completely normal.

An ectopic pregnancy does not necessarily mean your tubes are broken and fertility shot. There are risk factors that increase the chance of ectopic pregnancy and unfortunately endometriosis is a risk factor although it is not known why. However many women including myself, don’t have any risk factors and still experience ectopic pregnancy and we never find the underlying cause.

The chances of a further ectopic after a first in UK is 10%. So that’s 90% chance of the embryo being in right place next time.

While generally it is possible to conceive after an ectopic pregnancy, the amount of time it takes varies from couple to couple. Factors include age, general health, reproductive health and how often you have sex, among other things. It may be comforting to know that 65% of women are successfully pregnant within 18 months of experiencing an ectopic pregnancy and some studies suggest this rises to around 85% after two years. Importantly early scans avail. As soon as you know you are pregnant, contact your local EPU to inform them and book in for an early scan at around six weeks. Remind them of your previous ectopic pregnancy. This self refer route is the best route in our view. Hopefully you will have some comfort to know you are under the radar of medical professionals right away.

You should have a chance to have your questions answered and I would advise writing them down and speaking to the team when you next have your blood tests. If they cannot answer your questions, please ask for an appointment with a doctor who can.

Above all be kind to yourself and allow time to grieve, to both physically and emotionally. We will be here for you for as long as you need.

Sending much love,

Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards

During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.

If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?

Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk

Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk

We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653

Take a look at our newsletters and subscribe to our mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/986bdd6091ee/ectopic-matters

Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team

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Thankyou for your reply… it’s been 11 days now has a blood test today hoping it’s my last one… I really want to get back to normal now but feel like I can’t… my bleeding and discharge have completely gone I am having some mild cramping today not sure why did Try and speak to someone at the EPU but they were too busy to speak to me.

I honestly feel lost and very very confused.

I am going to get some ovulation test to track my cycle.

I feel we don’t get looked after enough the hospital doctors and my gp constantly brush me to the side I am hoping to get a hsg test done.

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Dear Kmw-89,

It is common to feel discomfort following ectopic pregnancy as your body has been through a great deal. The pain may be due to your body preparing to ovulate and many women experience ovulation pain when they did not before their ectopic pregnancy - including myself. You also may have a heightened perception because of the sad loss that you have had to go through. You should be able to manage any discomfort with over the counter pain relief, if this is not the case, please seek medical advice.

I am sorry you feel like you are not being heard. If you have to go again, I would make a point of saying you have some questions you need answering. Yes they maybe busy birthday need to make time for you. If you are struggling with feeling let down by your GP, is there another GO in your practice you could speak too?

We are here too, I found comfort looking at the posts on the boards, ready other people’s experiences and finding that my feelings were normal made me feel less alone.

The Trust also operates a helpline service and there’s no pressure whatsoever but if you would ever like the opportunity to speak over the phone to someone who has been through a similar experience, do feel free to call, details are below. We can take things at your pace entirely and you are free to ask any questions that are on your mind. You can talk about the ordeal you have been through and express your feelings to vent and let off some steam. We can exchange emails too, if you prefer that route. We’ll simply be here for you, however you wish and for as long as you wish. I

You are not alone.

Sending much love,

Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust

Registered Charity Number: 1071811

Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards

During the coronavirus outbreak, The EPT team is still working hard to provide crucial information and support to women and families experiencing ectopic pregnancy as quickly and efficiently as we can.

If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering or fundraising?

Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk

Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk

We provide a call-back helpline service: 020 7733 2653

Take a look at our newsletters and subscribe to our mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/986bdd6091ee/ectopic-matters

Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team